Dad jokes
Evan, yo mum rode on my big PP love, dad.
"Knock, knock.""Who's there?""Not your dad."Random kid: "My dad went to get milk. My mom said he will be back soon."
Why did the Dad cross the road?
To get the milk.
What has 4 hairy legs and fucks my sister?
Me & my dad!
One day I seen a little boy walking in the grocery store, so I asked if he was okay, and he said yes. I asked where his parents were, and he said his mom died years ago and his dad is stuck in the milk aisle.
What is an astronaut's favorite letter on a keyboard?
SPACE.
Why did the little kid cry? His dad forgot to pull out.
What's the difference between me and my mate...
I left my dad, while hers left with their friend Cancer.
Son: I heard mom got stung by a few bees this morning. Is she ok? Hospital?
Dad: She's ok now, no hospital.
Dad: She had to take the deep penis.
Son: Umm...... WHAT!?
Dad: I had to inject her with and EPIC PENIS.
Dad: Oh, for God's sakes.
Dad: Epi Pen.
What do you get when you put a clown, a peodophile, a gay wet person?
Answer: YOUR DAD
I should probably stop making jokes about 9/11.
My dad died to it, he was a great pilot.
If you have a twin sister, do you have the same name? Only if your mom and dad give you the same name.
Why do orphans hate dad jokes? They never return.
I know how unicorns make babies. The dad puts his horn in the girl's butt hole.
What's the difference between your dad and cancer?
Cancer came back...
Why do orphans eat cereal with water?
Their dad did not come back with the milk.
I hate when people make jokes about the Twin Towers.
My dad died on 9/11. He was a great pilot.
My dad died in 9/11. He was such a good pilot.
Dad: "Honey, I'll be right back. I need to get some papers."
Me: "Okay." *Falls asleep.*
*Wakes up in an adoption center.*
Damn, it was those kind of papers.
Roses are red, Violets are blue, Your grandma died, your dad left you too, Now you're living with your old grandma coot. Oh, let's not forget your mom left you, too. You gon' live alone, die alone, with no roses on your casket, too.