Cow jokes
Two cows are standing in a field.
Cow 1: Did you hear about the outbreak of mad cow disease?
Cow 2: Good thing I'm a helicopter.
What do cows like to do?
Cow-culating!
What do you call terrible milk?
Udder Bullshit.
Where did the cow go on his first date? To the moovies.
Penis.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Interrupting cow.
Interrupting cow wh---
MOOOO!
Did you hear about the boy who sat under a cow?
He got a pat on the head.
My cow just wandered into a field of marijuana. The steaks have never been so high...
What do you call a masturbating cow?
Beef stroganoff.
What do you call a cow jumping over barbed wire? Utter destruction.
"Meow, meow, I'm a cow," I said.
"Meow, meow, I'm a cow."
What college do cows go to?
The Mooniversity.
A kid milks a cow and goes to school and tells his friends, "I milked a cow, and it took awhile for it to warm up." His brother came over and said, "We don't have cows, we have bulls."
What is a cow's favorite party game?
Moo-sical chairs!
What do you call a sleeping cow?
A bull-dozer.
What did the mother cow say to the baby cow?
"It's pasture bed time."
Why was the cow afraid?
He was a cow herd.
Bad cows, bad cows, whatcha gonna moo?!
Why did the cow cross the road?
To get to the udder side.
I had problems milking my cow one morning. It was an udder failure.