Confusion jokes
Why did a Mexican go to Home Depot?
Because he thought it said "Home Deport."
I mess up goats for unicorns?
Jimmy the Unicorn or goat.
I don't even know.
Mom: Let's have an adoption party!
Kid: *cries*
Mom: What's wrong?
Kid: I'M ADOPTED????
"Your mother has been with us for 20 years," said John. "Isnât it time she got a place of her own?"
"My mother?" replied Helen. "I thought she was your mother."
Sister: Wanna know the difference between your singing and your flute playing?
Me: Sure... (Expecting a completely different response than what I get.)
Sister: Nvm, they have no difference.
Me: *Confused*
Sister: They're both horrible.
You go h dichotomy lol what do you want to what whatâs the name for the address for sure whatâs what I name it says I name it lol I donât o I have to get r CB n nu set set e Okay okay Iâll be at my place.
What's the most confusing day of the year for an illegitimate kid?
Father's Day.
How do you call a man with no body and no nose? Nobody knows.
One day my kid with no arms came up to me and said, "Mom, what's dark humor?" I thought about it, then said, "Go wave to that blind person." He just looked at me, confused, but angry.
I saw a man. I saw another man. And I saw another. Where am I? Comment below.
So I stayed at home for Halloween when I suddenly hear a knock on my door. I open and I see Penandes! I was confused and asked him why he does not wear a costume, and he said he doesn't need to.
Then I realized that he's a ghost and gave him 3 candies. Enjoy the candies Pruno!
A Chinese drunk and a Jewish drunk are sitting together on a park bench.
After finishing his drink, the Jew takes his bottle and smashes it over the head of the Chinese drunk.
"What the hell was that for?" asks the Chinese man, rubbing his head.
"That was for Pearl Harbor!" replies the Jewish drunk.
"Pearl Harbor? That was the Japanese! I'm Chinese!" he exclaims in return.
"Eh, Chinese, Japanese, Korean... you're all the same to me," the Jewish man explains as he gets up to leave.
The next day, the two drunks are back on the same park bench. The Chinese drunk suddenly takes his bottle and smashes it over the head of the Jew.
"Why the hell did you do that?" the Jewish man stammers.
"That was for the Titanic!" explains the Chinese drunk.
"The Titanic? What are you talking about? No one attacked it, it sunk when it hit an iceberg!" the Jew replies.
"Eh, Iceberg, Goldberg, Greenberg... you're all the same to me," the Chinese drunk happily retorts.
A father asked his son, Little Johnny, if he knew about the birds and the bees. âI donât want to know!â Little Johnny said, exploding and bursting into tears.
Confused, his father asked Little Johnny what was wrong. âOh, Pop,â Johnny sobbed, âFor me there was no Santa Claus at age six, no Easter Bunny at seven, and no Tooth Fairy at eight. And if youâre telling me now that grownups donât really have sex, Iâve got nothing left to live for!â
There was a family, the father's name was Mad, the mother is Brain, the brother's name is Nobody and the sister's name is Everybody.
One day, Nobody killed Everybody, and the father ran to the police's office and screamed, "NOBODY KILLED EVERYBODY!!!!!"
"Sir, are you okay?" The police asked.
"I said, NOBODY KILLED EVERYBODYYYYY!!!!!" The father yelled even louder.
"Are you mad?" The police asked.
"Yes, because my name is Mad!" The father exclaimed.
"Where's your brain?" Asked the police.
"At home because my wife name is Brain," the father said. The police fell down due to the confusion.
I was in a maze and I got to the end and they congratulated me. I said that was a-maze-ing!
Best friend *holds a sign up that says "what gender are you?"*
Me: Uh, male?..
Best friend *then unfolds paper so it reads "what gender are you attracted to?"*
Me: You silly goose.
*Silence for like three seconds*
Me: Still male though-
I recently learned that churches wonât let trans men become priests because they donât consider trans men as men, which is rather confusing to me.
As a Jew, I donât know very much about Christianity, but from what Iâve heard, donât priests love little boys?
My step bro thought I was single and tried to take me, but I said, "I'm take." And guess what he did? He cried.
Why? Why would you do that?
đ The Broken Family đ . Part 1
Girl: Mom, dad tried to have sex with me last night.
Mom: Are you serious?? (Shocked)
Girl: Yah. He said I must kiss him after he didn't want to let me go.
Mom: Am gonna kill ur dad (Angry)
Girl: Please mom, we still need him, who will buy use food and clothes. You don't have a job mom.
Mom: But what he did was wrong.
Girl: I know.
(SOUND OF A CAR COMING IN)
Mom: Is that ur dad.
Girl: Yes Mom
Comment Part 2
Why were the twin towers fighting?
Because they ordered pepperoni but got plain.