Common jokes

What do the Titanic and the Sixth Sense have in common?

Icy dead people.

Politicians and diapers have one thing in common: they should both be changed regularly... and for the same reason.

Trump and Biden didn’t get the memo.

What do feminists and dogs share in common? They need to be taken to obedience school.

What do altar boys and strippers have in common? Father issues.

What does Michael Jackson and Jeffery Dahmer have in common?

They both enjoy kids' company.

What do an orphan's parents have in common with Nemo? They all can't be found.

What do an ice cream cone and a Ukrainian orphanage have in common?

Children scream when they melt.

What do trans men and Pinocchio have in common?

Both are lying when they say "I'm a real boy."

(I'm a trans man myself lol)

What do an angler fish and a pedophile have in common?

They both like to hide in dark places, look creepy, and like to lure small creatures.

What do a priest and a Christmas tree have in common? They both like fairies sitting on them.

What do snow and friends have in common? If you pee on them, they disappear.

What does an Xbox/PlayStation and Michael Jackson have in common?

Kids turn them on.

What do Princess Diana and a landmine have in common? Both are easy to lay. Both costly and time-consuming to get rid of.

What did Saint Peter say to Diana when she got to the pearly gates? "Wipe that Merc off your face."

What do Ellen DeGeneres and homeless people have in common?

They don’t cook because they love eating out.

What do Michael Jackson and Tesco carrier bags have in common? They’re both made out of plastic and harmful to children.

What do LGBTQ folk and folk with scoliosis have in common?

None of them are straight.

What do planes and offices have in common?

They both tend to cross paths at the wake of disaster.

What does Michael Jackson and Chef from South Park have in common?

They both say "Hello children!"

What do sex and food have in common?

Grandma makes both better.

What do Santa Claus and Bill Cosby have in common?

They both come while you’re asleep.