Scrub jokes
One Tuesday afternoon, Little Jonny decides he wants extra homework, so he went to his teacher and said, "Hello, can I have extra homework this week?"
The teacher replied with, "Sure, be at my house Friday afternoon to cut my lawn, polish the counters, scrub the baseboards, scrub and paint the walls!"
And Johnny replied with, "That's not what I meant, but at least I'll get paid!"
The teacher said, "How about $200 each job?"
Johnny replied with, "OK."
Friday afternoon at her house, after Johnny does all the jobs, he asked for his payment and the teacher laughed and said, "You do know that Tuesday was April Fools' Day, right?"
What do you call a Barbie doll that鈥檚 wearing scrubs?
A plastic surgeon. 馃樂
How do you clean ash off a stove with chemicals?
How does a rapper clean his house?
With a LIL' SCRUB.
Why is Helen Keller's snatch always sore?
She wipes with a Brillo pad.
My 14 year old daughter went shopping at a grocery story.
She gets to the register and she asked the cashier to scan her scarred wrist.
The cashier scanned it and replied with, "Ma'am this item is worthless."
My short friend called me a scrub, even though he was the one below me.
When recycling toilet paper, you really need to process the crap out of it.
Conversely, you can recycle a condom quite easily: just turn it inside out and shake the fuck out of it.
"This morning, I came out my front door to see my neighbor frantically trying to scrub off the word "PEDO" that had been spray-painted on his front window."
"What's been going on, John?" I asked.
"Fucking kids," came his mumbled reply.
The dirty bastard!