New Christmas Jokes - Page 8 - Worst Jokes Ever

What does Santa say for the toys to go to bed?

"Time to hit the sack!"

Why do Christmas trees like wheelchairs? Because they have kids.

I’m going to be busy having dinner soon. I have internet for Christmas 🎄 and I have some Christmas.

Can [I] ask your sister how you are going for Christmas? And [to clarify,] I have internet.

Last night I was watching a Scotland Christmas movie...

And the part when Mary tells Joseph that she is pregnant, Joseph was surprised, and he exclaimed, "Jesus Christ!!!" I immediately stopped watching and changed the channel.

What are the differences between Santa and Joe Biden?

The kids actually want to sit on Santa’s lap.

Little Johnny got a train set for Christmas. He takes it around the circle, parks it at the station, and says, "Alright, you motherfuckers get off here, and you motherfuckers get off here." His mom comes rushing in and says, "Little Johnny, we don’t use that kind of language, go to your room and think about what you did!"

After a few hours, she lets him out of his room. He goes back to play with his train set. He takes it around the circle, parks it at the station, and says, "Okay, you guys get off here, and you guys get off here. And if you have any complaints about the two hour delay, take it up with the bitch in the kitchen."