Christmas jokes
What movie does an orphan want for Christmas? "Spiderman: Homecoming";)
No one:
Taeil: "Happy Christmas~"
Haechan: "It's Merry Christmas."
What do Michael Jackson and Santa Claus have in common?
They both leave the little kids' room with empty sacks.
Why is Santa's sack so big? Because he only comes once a year.
What did the kid who has no arms get for Christmas?
He couldn't even open it.
Ever wondered why Chinese kids don’t believe in Santa?
They made the toys.
And Mary said God had given her a child, so Joseph went and joined Fathers For Justice.
I love it when your parents come round for Christmas. I just wish we couldn't hear them through the ceiling.
What is an animal that kids get for Christmas and can easily give to someone else?
A white elephant.
Why does Santa have three gardens?
So he can Hoe Hoe Hoe!
What type of alphabet does an elf learn?
The elf-abet.
So a girl goes to Santa in the mall, and Santa asks what she would like for Christmas. So the kid says: “a little sister”. So then Santa says: “bring me your mother!”
What did the pretty young pre-pubescent 14 year old boy say when he got a homosexual pedophile for Christmas?
He said he was awfully touched!
Santa Claus gave a child a bike and a football. The child wasn’t happy. Why?
He had no legs.
Who gave Jesus his birthday presents every year?
Santa Claus!
Why did Helen Keller have no ornaments on her Christmas tree?
'Cause she always dropped them.
Family are together playing charades.
Me: "50 Shades of Grey!" Yes, I'm so good at charades! Put your shirt back on, Nan!
if an emo doesn't get better by Christmas Santas reindeer won't be the only thing jumping off roofs this year
What are the similarities between an emo and some Christmas lights?
They are both going to be hanging from a tree.
What's the similarity between a Christmas ornament and a person?
They both hang...