Chinese Jokes

Why are Chinese so good at jay-walking? Cause they can't tell the difference between green and red light with their tiny eyes.

One day 2 Chinese with broken English go to America. When they arrive they go to a small place to eat. When they look at the menu they see "hot dog" but since there English is bad, they think its literally a roasted dog and order it. When it comes back there both surprised and one of them ask "What part of the dog did you get."

Why are there not that much phones in China? Because there’s too much wing and Wongs so they will wing the wong number

A man asked his girlfriend what she wanted to eat one night, and she said Chinese food, so he took her to China. The next night, he asked her again. She said Indian, so he took her to India. The next night, he asked her again. She said, "Nothin'," so he took her to Africa.

What's do you call a chinese hooker that won't get on her knees? Cantonese....

What do you call a Chinese person with no legs?

Lim Ping.

Chinese teacher phone rang going to class and he said My phone the Ring Ring it's my wife Ring Ring

My cousin: Brother I lost in a game of Call of Duty: Moe Bill [he was supposed to pronounce it as mobile however I left it as it is] Me: so tell me about it then. My cousin: I lost to Sum_Baldi Me: somebody? Don’t they have like the name of you opponents? My cousin: no no no the name was Sum_Baldi. S.U.M_B.A.L.D.I Me: Ok my bad. Continue My cousin: I got Sum_Baldi and 5 seconds later I got kill but [by] Sum_Fing_Wong. Me: it’s not wrong! In call of duty, you are suppose to kill or be killed. My cousin: no no no the name was Sum_Fing_Wong. S.U.M_F.I.N.G_W.O.N.G Me: my bad again. Do continue. My cousin: I got so angry I blowup Me: so you got blowed up, by what weapon? My cousin: by the game. Me: [was not expecting that for an answer]

It's amazing how dog owners can make their dogs shout different things. For example, Czech dogs go barf, American dogs go woof and Chinese dogs go sizzle

The other day i pushed a Chinese women off the golden gate bridge i was Wong on so many levels.

It's the 1940s

The chink was counting his shillings The chink was bitching His wife got raped in nanking The chink counts his shillings

The chink gets sook chinged!

What did the Chinese couple name their retarded baby?

Sum Ting Wong.

How do chinese people name there children? They thro pots and pans down the stairs and listen for the sounds, Ching Chong Chang.

im m 24 and i was fucking a chinese lady and she kept screaming "im tu yung!" like idk what that name is

What are some red flags?

Chinese, Danish, Spanish, Turkish and Albanian.

What do you call a Chinese car thief? Tommy Tookamota

In a proud, boastful voice, Gemma told the old Chinese woman who was babysitting her that onions were the only food that could make you cry. The woman nodded and said that was true enough. They continued eating for a while. This is really good! the little girl exclaimed. What's this meat! The old lady replied with: well there was a brown dog in your yard that wouldn't stop yapping.

I took my girlfriend to a Chinese Restaraunt. One hour after ordering, I went to ask the chef what is going on. That was until I heard barking from the kitchen.