Children jokes
What do Michael Jackson and Santa Claus have in common?
They both leave the little kids' room with empty sacks.
What is the difference between Michael Jackson and my uncle? Nothing, they both steal children.
I ate all of your mommy's orphans.
Ever wondered why Chinese kids don’t believe in Santa?
They made the toys.
The most powerful thing in the world is babies. This is because they cry and get what every they want.
Children in the dark make mistakes.
Mistakes in the dark make children.
And the children of Israel wandered round the desert for 40 years, until eventually Moses' wife said, "Are you going to ask for directions, or what?"
Why can't orphans steal bases?
Because they can't find home.
Hi, welcome to Dave's Orphanage, you make 'em, we take 'em!
What couldn’t the boy in the wheelchair do when he saw a bully? He couldn’t stand up for himself.
In Home Alone, if the kid was an orphan, it would just be called "Alone."
A teacher asked her class “what is sex?”
Little Johnny got up and said: “Sex is a *temptation* Caused by a *sensation* Where the boy sticks his *location* Into a girls *destination* To increase the *population* Of the next *generation* Did you get my *explanation*? Or do you need a *demonstration*?”
The teacher faints.
Why are half of the orphans blind? Because they can't find their parents.
Why are you making all these bad jokes about orphans? What did they ever do to you?
Why are orphans bad at poker?
They don't know what a full house is.
I saw a kid crying and I asked him where his parents were...
Man, I love working at an orphanage.
Why can’t orphans go on school field trips?
Parent Signature: _______
Why do orphans not like the movie Frozen?
Because for them, love isn't an open door.
What's a pedophile's favorite part of Halloween? Free delivery.
What's the difference between a Lambo and 200 children in my basement? One screams; the children don't.