Children jokes
I saw a kid crying and I asked him where his parents were...
Man, I love working at an orphanage.
Why can’t orphans go on school field trips?
Parent Signature: _______
Why do orphans not like the movie Frozen?
Because for them, love isn't an open door.
What's a pedophile's favorite part of Halloween? Free delivery.
What's the difference between a Lambo and 200 children in my basement? One screams; the children don't.
Why can't orphans close their video games?
Because they can't find the home button.
Why do orphans like milk so much?
Because they got no milk as a baby.
Q: Why can orphans swim?
A: They have or-fins.
You know what you could use? An orphan as a punching bag.
What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
Average Kid: brings mp3 to school.
Rich Kid: Brings mp4 to school.
Quiet Kid: Brings an mp5.
What type of cake can orphans not have?
Homemade.
What do you call a group of depressed kids?
Suicide squad.
How are Tinder and orphans alike?
You swipe left till you find the one you like.
What do I call a white person with 15 black kids?
Coach.
If Hillary and Biden got locked in a room together, all they would talk about is how to ruin America and make a plan to steal children.
When I was watching my daughter at the park earlier, another parent asked a man, "Which one is yours?" and he replied, "I'm still choosing." She looked horrified.
The moment when she tells you: "I'm a virgin. Be gentle!" And you tell her, "Don't worry, I used to work with kids."
Why can't orphans play baseball? Because they can't find home.
DAD: I'm bringing your toys to the orphanage.
SON: Why?
DAD: You're going to need them.
I was having a party in my basement, and my friend asked me what that bag covered in blood was for. I said, "Oh, that's the bag I catch the children with to torture them in this basement."