Childhood

Childhood jokes

Word

    • A kindergarten teacher asks her students, "Do you know any words that start with P?"

    Little Timmy responds with, "Elmo."

  • 0

    • Adoption

    • Son: Dad, am I adopted?

    Father: What? No! Out of all the kids in the adoption center, do you really think I would pick you?

  • 3
    • Childhood memes

    Poop

    • Jeffy: "Daddy, Daddy, a monster said it’s gonna poop in your hat!"

    Marvin: "I don’t believe that."

    Jeffy: "But he said, 'Jeffy, I’m gonna poop in your Daddy’s hat!'"

    The next morning,

    Jeffy: "Daddy, a monster pooped in your hat!"

    *Marvin/Mario looks in his hat*

    Marvin: "Jeffy, I don’t believe you, you pooped in my hat!"

  • 1

    • Mom

    • When I was 11, my mom came home from the bar super drunk that night, and I just wanted to know if they knew where the cat was because I heard a noise. We had a loooooooong talk the next morning.

    Hooker

    • I was sitting with my little brother when he was about four-ish. He was starting to really like to identify objects for some reason, so he was showing me his toys. He grabbed his toy Mator truck and then pointed to the wheels, saying, “These are wheels.” I said, “Good job, yes they are.” Then he pointed to the bumper and said, “This is a bumper.” Again, I congratulated him. Then, he grabbed the toy’s wire with the hook at the end and said, “And this is a hooker.” I died laughing.

  • 2

    • Rapist

    • When I was very young...

    My classmates played a game called kiss chase. Some were really good at catching the girls and then kissing them.

    They are rapists now.

  • 2

    • Height

    • You're so short, I bet your parents left you at home most times when they went to the pool because they're scared you'll drown in the kiddie pool.