Childhood jokes
Why does an orphan always get out in baseball?
Because he can't run home.
I saw an orphan in the grocery store and asked him, "Where's your mom?" and he cried. Why?
What is the difference between an orphan and an apple tree?
The apples get picked.
Why was the orphan so successful?
They told him, "Go big or go home," he only had one option.
What is an orphan's favorite period? Homeroom.
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What do you call an orphan's family reunion?
Me time.
Why do orphans hate the color black? Because it reminds them of their dark history.
If you're bored, joke about an orphan. What are they going to do? Tell their parents?
When my dad left, he said he would bring back the milk, but 20 years later he only came with my new sister and eggs. And I confronted him, and he said, "I used all the milk to make your sister."
What is an orphan's favorite song? "Lost Boy."
How do you make an orphan's hands bleed?
Tell them to clap until their parents come home.
Why do orphans not like cereal? Because their dad never came back with milk.
Q: Why do orphans love boomerangs?
A: Because they actually come back.
New Teacher: I was an orphan as a kid.
Students: Damn.
Teacher: Is anyone missing?
Students: Your parents!
What kind of family pictures do orphans take?
Selfies!!
What is a little zombie's favorite stuffed animal?
It's a deady bear.
Today I got a lecture from my mother, and congratulated her. Why?
Because she managed not to damage me in a physical fashion.
What do you call an orphan family photo?
A selfie.
But wait, what family? He never had one.
Why do orphans drink water with cereal?
Because their dad never came back with the milk.
What do boobs and toys have in common?
They were both originally made for kids, but daddies end up playing with them.