Son: Can I go to my friend's mum? Mum: No! Son: Dad was right, I am a son of a bitch! Mum: Bad news, but you're adopted!!
Why was Tickle Me Elmo upset when he left the factory?
Because they only gave him one test tickle.
What do orphans like about tattoos? They stick around.
A favorite childhood memory was building sandcastles with my grandfather, that is until my mom took the urn away from me.
Why do orphans become hookers?
They can call someone daddy.
Teacher: "If you don't understand, ask your parents at home."
Orphan: "I don't have neither of those :c"
Q: What was Hellen Keller's favorite game as a kid?
A: Musical chairs.
Why can't orphans go to sleepovers?
Their parents never say yes.
Why do orphans always have water in their cereal? Because the dad never came back with the milk.
What's an orphan's favorite Roblox game?
Adopt Me.
Kid. What is an orphan's favorite breakfast?
Teacher. What?
Kid. Fruity pebbles with water.
Teacher. Why water?
Kid. Cause his dad never came back with the milk.
What's the Pixar movie close to being a pornstar? Toy Story... *I got a friend in me*
Have you heard about the baby with cancer? It never gets old.
What do orphans call their parents?
Unicorns because they don’t exist.
When I was a boy, I had a disease that required me to eat dirt three times a day in order to survive... It's a good thing my older brother told me about it.
Why do orphans work boomerangs?
Because it's the only thing that comes back.
What kind of family pictures do orphans take?
Selfies!!
When my dad left, he said he would bring back the milk, but 20 years later he only came with my new sister and eggs. And I confronted him, and he said, "I used all the milk to make your sister."
As siblings, we always joke about being adopted. It stops being funny when you're playing in your parents' room and find both of your adoption papers. : )
What is an orphan's favorite song? "Lost Boy."
