Child jokes
What do you call an orphan being kidnapped?
A surprise adoption!!
I asked a kid why he was so blue.
Didn't realize his parents were choking him out.
I fared it. I ticked the orphan. He jiggled, he was burning, so I did it again.
What is an orphan's favorite period? Homeroom.
What does milk and a kid with cancer have in common?
An expiration date.
What’s a depressed kid’s favorite game? Hangman.
Have you seen the Woody Allen v Mia Farrow series on HBO? If you like details about child molestation without having to do it yourself, boy do I have the show for you!
Orphans are the best targets for bullying, since who are they gonna cry to? Their parents?
What has eight legs and doesn’t rape children?
The Jackson 4.
Why can you hit an orphan?
Because they can’t tell their parents.
OK, so Kenya and Kariah are both orphans that hate orphan jokes, so how about we make a joke out of them!
Father talks to his 5-year-old son: “No, Petie, you don’t have to worry. There is no monster sleeping under your bed. It sleeps every day in the bed next to me.”
Why don't a gun and an orphan have anything in common? The gun is actually useful.
Why can’t an orphan play baseball?
They don’t know where home is.
Dark humor is like cancer; it's funnier when kids get it.
Children are so ungrateful nowadays. I got my daughter a bike, but now she’s crying on the floor saying, “I don’t have legs!”
Why do orphans suck at baseball?
Because they can't run home.
A Story:
I lived in a small house. Behind my house was a big forest. If I went in the forest, then I heard scary sounds. That was very dreadful. I had a son. He was 9 years old. One day he went into the forest and did not come back. I called the police, but it couldn't help. I went looking. I really wanted my son Robby back. I missed him so! With a flashlight and compass, I went into the dark, eerie forest. Then the noises came again, but this time I also heard a scream. A scream from a nine year old child. It was Robby, certainly! I stopped in front of a tunnel.
Sequel follows...
What do pedophiles do when they wake up?
Turn on the child safety lock on the car.
When a Muslim dies, he gets 72 virgins.
It's the same thing with priests, except the virgins are children.