Today I learned that a group of piranhas can maul a small child down to the bone in under 20 seconds. Well I lost my job at the aquarium today.
A woman is in the hospital giving birth. The doctor comes up to her afterwards.
Dr: "I'm sorry, I have good news and bad news."
Woman: "What's the bad news?"
Dr: "Your baby is Ginger."
Woman: "Ok, so what's the good news?"
Dr: "It's dead!!!"
Why did lil timmy drop his lollies
(He was hit by a train
My uncle sayEd to me once ur my favorite child and I said u mean Nece he said no my favorite child
Q. What's the difference between my phone battery in an anti vax kid? A. Nothing they both die at ten
Why was the orphan walking through the neighborhood? I don't know, either. It's not like he has a home to go to.
Why couldn't the orphan use the swing, because they had no arms.
What do children and lights have in common? They both hang from ceilings!
Not funny, here’s another.
Why can’t China play baseball? They ate the bat.
I was listening to my children praying. And my youngest that can speak said to me: "Mama, why is Gramma dead?" I smiled and told her, "Well, less than 10 years ago when I was 5, your age, my Momma took me into the basement with some hot rando during a party. And 9 months later Shinana was born. One Pedo after another and your 4 siblings are born. The Pedo I met last night told me, 'If your mother's the one making you do this, do what you do best.' I listened and the next day she didn't leave her bed breathing. When the Pedo found out he left me and your soon to be brother." She replies with, "Make his child support expensive!" Now he has to pay me 2,000 U.S. dollars every month. Like the other ones that ran away.
When i was a child i was made to walk the plank.... We couldnt afford a dog
I went up to a kid and asked are you an orphan? They said yes what gave me away? I said your parents
Where do pedofiles do when they wake up
Turn on the child safety lock on the car
Q. What’s a good thing about a child molesters A. They drive slow through school zones
Why did the child drop their icecream They got hit by a bus
One day a child walks along and asks” mother why am I called butterfly” the mother replies” a butterfly landed on you as a baby” A minute later another child comes along and says” mother why and I called feather” the mother then replied “because a feather fell on your head when you where born” then Brick comes along and says “ ahahhsdjsjskxs”
Orphan boy: "Your dad is probably disappointed in you. I mean, look at you."
Me: "Well, at least my parents kept me. Where are yours?"
How do you get chewing gum out of a child's hair? Cancer.
Why did the orphan want to become a prostitute?
To get a daddy.
kid:dad what happen to the kid napper. dad:he had a nap Kid:where is he now dad:HELL
What to gift a child molester , who already has everything ? A bigger county with more believers
