Child jokes
What’s green and orange and sits at the bottom of the swimming pool?
A baby with burst armbands.
Get off of here, kids!
What has 50 legs but can't walk?
25 disabled children.
After 12, it's lunch. 😂
Why is an orphan really good at being naughty?
Because they have no one to tell them off.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall? One, you just need to throw it hard enough.
If your wife dies of childbirth, can you press charges on the baby?
What is red and very rare?
A child in a blender.
Why can orphans travel around so much? They never get homesick.
We are always joking around about being adopted, when really we are still living in the orphanage.
When you're angry, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
Jingle bells, Braedyn says, "Yummy!" to a turd.
Then, he takes it out of the toilet and wipes it all over the wall!
Jingle bells, Braedyn says, "Yummy!" to a turd.
Then, he takes it out of the toilet and wipes it all over the wall!
What's the difference between a little boy and a freezer?
The freezer doesn't scream when you put your meat in it.
A man was taking a child into a dark forest.
The child said, "I'm scared!"
The man replied, "Well I have to walk home alone."
So I got my son a trampoline for Christmas this year, and he was so ungrateful, like he just sat there crying in his wheelchair. What has this world come to?
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
Depends how hard you throw them.
Yo daddy so poor, when yo mama ask for sum child support money, yo dad don’t have it! 🤣
When I was a child, my parents told me my uncle was 'sleeping with the fishes.' At first, I thought he bought a water bed, but I then discovered he was killed and buried at sea.
Why can’t an orphan play baseball?
Because they can’t find home.
FICTIONAL BOOKS / AUTHORS
Outdoor Entertaining by Patty O.
Over the Mountaintop by Hugo First.
Plumbing for Idiots by Duane Pipes.
Music Theory by Amanda Lynn Player.
Meterology 101 By Wendy Reign and Sonny Daze.
Oh God By Dixie Rect.
Please Don't Stop By Craven Moorehead.
Life And Times Of A Porn Star By Dixie Normous.
Right Stuff By Dang Lin-Wang.
How To Take Care of Your Cat By Connie Lingus.
Right Way 2 Orgasm By Buster Cherry.
The Unwanted Child By Brooke N Rubbers.