Cant jokes
Why can’t an orphan play baseball?
Because they don’t know where home is.
So, me and my girlfriend that I just got 7 weeks ago, we’re in class. We had this sub named Mrs. Bellatrix.
We both raised our hands and she called on both of us.
Me: First of all, are we in kindergarten? We can’t be doing 4x4 kinda stuff.
Leah: And also, are you from Harry Potter?
Why can't an orphan play baseball?
Because they can't get a home run.
Why can't Juice Wrld play Black Ops II?
Because he can't handle 6 perks.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't find home.
Why can't orphans have relationships?
Because they have no one to call "daddy."
Why can't orphans go on field trips?
Parents' signature _______________________________
A Mexican boy said, "I can't do this." Then a guy says, "You can do it, we are Mexican, not Mexicant."
"Brown bear, brown bear, what do you see?" I see a blind man looking at me.
"Blind man, blind man, what do you see?"
Oh sorry, I forgot you can't see.
Pete the panther was racing a cheetah but lost. The cheetah said, "You can’t beat me, I’m a cheetah." Pete said, "Yeah, you are a cheetah cheetah."
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they don't know home base.
Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom?
Because the “P” is silent.
Hi! This is a good prank I did! Okay, my sister has this crush and his name is Braylon. So, he texted my sister saying he wants to hang out with her, which I think means date. So anyway, I did this. My text said, "Hi Braylon, I can't hang out today... or the other day because I have homework, so please no hang out!" This is super wrong, but funny! Braylon texted back and said, "Fine, I can help." And I texted back and said, "Oh, will come here around 10:00." And my sister did not know he was coming... She was so embarrassed, she was still in her nightgown! HAHAHAH. O to the k, bye, that's the prankster!!!!
You guys should be ashamed of yourselves, making fun of the disabled. After all, they can't stand up for themselves.
Why can't dinosaurs clap?
Because they're dead.
Why did my mother buy me a Honda? She knows I can't move, so she pushed my wheelchair with me in it into the ocean. I survived just by a second, but a shark got my wheelchair, fucking bitch.
Tim and Tom were at work. Tim said, "I'm sick of this. I'm going to act like an idiot to get sent home." So Tim was on the roof saying, "I am a light bulb!" The boss walked in and said, "Tim, go home, you're acting like a dick!" Then Tom started packing up and Tim said, "Tom, why are you packing up?" Tom says, "I can't work in the fucking dark, can I?"
Why can't depressed kids high five a tree? It will leave them hanging.
Why can't orphans play baseball? Because they can't find home!
A serial killer was at my house and killed all my family but me. Why? I was in the living room.
What do sloths and depressed people have in common? They both hang off trees.
What is a group of depressed kids called? The suicide squad.
What is an emo's most hated game? Hangman.
Because it's rubbing it in their face that they can't hang themselves.
I saw this advert in a window that said: “Television for sale, £1, volume stuck on full.” I thought, “I can’t turn that down.”