Cant jokes
What’s the difference between 3 cocks and my sister?
My sister can’t take a joke about cocks in bed.
I can't not believe you stupid fucks. This isn't funny. Just like a bunch of cunts not to believe there is nothing can't do.
BTW what do you call a manly woman's cunt? Nothing. Who gives a fuck?
Why don't booties make good drummers?
They can't keep a beat without making a FART NOISE.
What do you call a rapper who can’t rhyme?
A speech impediment.
Why can’t you have a proper conversation with a gay person?
They’re never straight with you.
What do you call a rapper who can't rhyme?
A rapscallion without the rap.
Why don't butts get along?
Because they can't stand each other's cheek!
Would you steal 20 dollars from a stupid 6 year old kid with Down syndrome who can't talk and make ah ah ah noises, or get one dollar for saying the N word?
What do you call a rapper who can’t rhyme?
Unemployed.
What do you call a rapper who can’t rap?
A wrapper with no FILLING.
Why can’t orphans go on school trips?
They need a parent signature.
Why can't Jesus judge gay people?
He got nailed right before he died.
Why can’t you take an Asian guy golfing? Because you can’t drive. Every time he does, he tries to put a hole-in-one.
What’s the difference between Stephen Hawking and a walkie-talkie?
He can’t walkie or talkie.
Jill goes home one night with a guy she met at a club. He's tall, super hot, and seems different than most guys she meets. They arrive at his place and head straight to his room. Jill can't help but notice a shelf full of teddy bears. On the bottom are small teddy bears, on the middle are medium-sized teddy bears, and finally, on the top are large teddy bears, all lined up beside each other.
She begins to think that he is sentimental and sweet, and isn't afraid to show it. Her heart melts and she want to give him the best night of his life. She gives him a blowjob, and lets him really give it to her, and even takes it in the rear! In the morning, she slowly gets dressed, and smiles at him and asks, "How was that?" He nods and says, "Not too fuckin' bad at all. Help yourself to a prize on the second shelf!"
A husband comes home from work one day, and his wife is watching the Food Network. The husband asks, "Why do you watch that? You still can’t cook," and the wife responds, "Why do you watch porn? You still can’t fuck."
What do you call a rapper who can't keep a beat?
A RAPPER-TAP-TAP!
Why don't rappers ever become chefs?
Because they can't stop droppin' the beet!
God creates dog.
God: "You are man's best friend."
Dog: "That's pretty sexist."
God: "No, man as in- You know what, FUCK IT! You can't speak!"
Dog: "....."
God: "And chocolate kills you!"
Dog: "🐶"
What do you call a rapper who can't afford jewelry?
"UNBLINGABLE"