One thing you can ask Mario:
"Can you jump up and down for me?"
One thing you can ask Mario:
"Can you jump up and down for me?"
What thing can jump the highest?
Emo kids, some of them are still in the air.
Johnny: Why do cuss words exist?
Mom: That's not something you should think about right now. I'll tell you when you're older.
|| 20 YEARS LATER ||
Johnny: Mom, now can you tell me why cuss words exist?
Mom: Because some people invented them so that they could use them when something annoying happened to them.
Johnny: Damn, Mom, you shoulda told me that when I was still seven 'cause now I really feel like that person.
The teacher was asking some of her students the meanings of words.
"Sally, can you tell me what 'beautiful' means?"
Sally: "You..."
Teacher: "Aww! How nice! But next time, say the actual definition. Now, can someone tell me what 'malicious' means?"
Andrew: "A dangerous person and/or virus."
Teacher: "Great job, Andrew! Now, what does 'fat' mean? Johnny?"
Johnny: "A pig."
Teacher: "Could you tell me the actual defini- "
Johnny: "In other words, the person who last spoke to me!"
Welcome to Joe's abortion clinic! No fetus can beat us! You make 'em, we take 'em!
The potholes so big in Oklahoma Can make a whole garden.
Why does Helen Keller use her left hand to play with herself?
So she can moan with her right hand.
Aren't paraplegics just plegics who can fly?
Me: Doctor, can I get a new butt? My old one has a crack in it.
Doctor: I told you a billion times already. Everyone's butt has a crack in it.
Me: How do you know that?