Call jokes
What do you call a cemetery of dead Arabs? A mine field.
I called my mom on Alexa, and she told me, "Please take out the trash." I said, "But I can't, you're not here."
What do you call a bus full of kids? A killstreak.
Chapter 1. "Kid teacher"
Mrs. Lewis: Class, I want everyone to look at their textbooks and find a reasonable essay topic. My suggestion is page 232 or 678. Now, this essay counts as the final grade for the semester. Now do it, or you will repeat 5th grade again! Now turn to page 100, and we'll start reading from there. Do you all understand?
Neilela: Yes ma'am, quick question, we don't have to do it today... do we?
Mrs. Lewis: Yes! It is today!
Andrua: It sounds boring, and all I have to do today is be a big jerk who gives way too much instruction.
Mrs. Lewis: Anyway, let's get to work.
56 hours later.
Mrs. Lewis: Kids, when I call you, please tell me what you liked about your essay. When I call your name, Carl.
Carl: Why me? Yes?
Mrs. Lewis: What did you like about the story, Carl?
Carl: Um... I liked it when... um... um... um... um...
Jeklen: He didn't even read the story because he's too busy trying to look up the letter "J" and its meaning!
Carl: Jeklen, shut up and stop biting your hair.
Jeklen: At least I know what the letter "J" is.
Mrs. Lewis: Class, please listen. Carl, did you read the story that I asked you?
Carl: Well, not really because you were the one reading it in class, so...
Vronica: For real!
Carl: Mhmmm
Mrs. Lewis: Listen class, this homework needs to be done today! DO IT!
Kimbriel: Ms. Lewis, I have a lot of questions about tonight's homework.
Mrs. Lewis: Yes?
Kimbriel: You assigned so many things just for a little test! What?
Mrs. Lewis: I need a break! Peyton, you're in charge!
All students: NO, NOT PEYTON !!!!!!
Peyton: Me? In charge? Of the class?
Jessica: Wow, but you're all about the boredom!
Peyton: Shut up! yeeeeeeee
Peyton: Ms. Lewis, there must be a mistake, how can I be in charge? I'm 11... I think...
Ari: To think that yesterday she thought she was 8 years old.
Oh sorry... I think.
Mrs. Lewis: Have you ever heard of a teacher's vacation?
All students: That's not a thing!
I never heard of it...
Mrs. Lewis: Well, me and Ms. Sumrall, we are going on a "teacher vacation", we can do it because we become calmer, or we don't get angry at the students. AND WE CAN DO IT!
Khloe: Why?
Mrs. Lewis: Because I am an adult.
Ms. Sumrall: Is Petrina ready?
Ms. Lewis: Yes, thank goodness for this!
Kenya: Bye? "Chapter 2" To be continued...
What do you call a mug? A mug dummy.
What do you call a Downey with glasses?
No, me neither.
Q: What do you call 9/11? A: Enemy persion airstrike.
Why are they called "breaking news" in the entire world?
Because they are breaking the whole entire news.
What do you call it when a guy named Fred enters Panera Bread?
Panera Fred.
Q. What do you call a biracial kid in a vegetative state?
A. A mixed vegetable.
Q: What is it called when a hoe is getting ready for her party but doesn't know what to wear but is thinking about it? A: A thotprosses
I knew a girl called Melissa, but she was a tranny, and he could suck his own dick.
What do you call a 96-year-old who can still masturbate?
Miracle Whip.
What do you call a cut cucumber?
A guy with no legs.
What do you call a Panera Bread marking a test?
A Panera grade.
What is it called when an art teacher has a heart attack?
An art attack!
What do you call a tree 🌲 that is magic? A magic tree 🌳.
What do you call an acid with a bad attitude?
A-Mean-O-Acid.
What do you call a mosquito in your language?
We don't call them, they just come and bite.
What do you call a pool full of disabled people?
Vegetable soup.