Butter

Butter Jokes

Rumor

I was gonna tell a rumor about butter, but I don’t want to spread it.

Butterfly

Q: Why did the father throw butter out the window?

A: He wanted to see a butterfly.

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  • Margarine

    The son margarine shows his father his test that he failed.

    Father: Son, you can do butter!

    Smoothie

    My Smoothie Ingredients: - Bananas - Strawberry - The Blood of my ex - Peanut Butter

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  • Mother

    Today, my mother was making breakfast. As she was tired, my brother asked if there was anything to do today.

    She responded with a list:

    - Take out the trash.

    - Clean your room.

    - Make lunch and be sure to butter the electrical sockets.

    That’s all sweetie!

    Stick

    Two sticks of butter walk into a butter bar. One says to the other, "Aren't you going to introduce me to your friends?" He replies, "Sure, dis my butter from another utter."

    Butterfly

    One day a father and a daughter were at a park. The daughter accidentally kills a butterfly. The father says, "Just because you killed the butterfly, you don't get butter for a week."

    They were there the next day, and the daughter kills a cockroach. The father laughs and says, "Nice try."

    Dairy

    Today was a bad day. There was a man throwing butter and cheese at me, how dairy!

    Gossip

    Do you wanna hear the gossip about butter?

    Actually, I shouldn't spread it.

    Bread

    My mom is the jelly, and my dad is the peanut butter. And I am the bread, the only thing keeping them together.

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  • Rumor

    Did you hear the rumors about butter?

    Never mind—you shouldn't spread them.

    Son

    Today I saw my son lick out a tub of butter. I told him to make a sandwich without butter for a week (as a punishment). He said, "Okay," and licked the bread. "It's really easy to spread," he said. LOL!

    Cockroach

    My mom has a policy where if you kill a butterfly, no butter for a week, and if you kill a grub, no grub for a week.

    She killed a cockroach today. I have some bad news for her.

    Gossip

    Have you heard the gossip about the butter? Oh, I guess I better not spread it.