But jokes

I'm not a chef, but boy, are these days getting harder and harder to get through.

My mom told me to take out the trash, but I couldn't find you.

We can nip March Madness in the bud, but only if we detect the warning signs of brooding, anti-social February Fever.

Riddles not jokes.

What has 4 legs but cannot walk?

What has bark but no bite?

There's a one-story house in which everything is orange. Orange walls, orange doors, orange furniture. What color are the stairs?

What has holes but can carry water?

What is in front of you, but cannot be seen?

What is something you have inside you that is pink, but cannot be seen?

What can you catch but not throw?

And last one:

What can rule, but not command?

Tell me the answers in the comments.

Like 90% of this was from this link: https://parade.com/947956/parade/riddles/

One more thing: Don't google it or search it up, use your brain to answer these.

I would say something funny, but I would have to dig someone up.

What do you call Shroud when he is hurt?

ShrOWd.

Guess what, Shroud is back on wje, I don't know why, but he is...

Daughter: Dad, what's your opinion on abortions?

Dad: Ask your sister.

Daughter: But I don't have a sister.

Dad: Exactly.

Listen, my friends say I am gay, but I tell them I am not because I am not happy. In fact, I have no life. You are my friend. I trust you with my life. Now, can you take it?

I got a great corona virus joke, but you wouldn’t get it.

I always felt like a man trapped in a woman's body. But then I was born.

But in my defense, I was young then, and I had a womb without a view.

September 2020: Three makeup tutorialists, James Charles, Jeffree Star, and Tati Westbrook have gone through smoke after the controversy surrounding the three of them. Honestly, Tati and Jeffree are trash. I just don't find their content interesting, and I don't watch James Charles, but I also dislike his content.

Okay here's your funny joke!

Who is the best makeup artist?

Just because Jeffree has "Star" at the end doesn't mean he is best.

What did the butt cheek say to the other when you open us a big order of "choochie man" comes out?

So Kenny finally found his one true love.

But he can't be with her because it's illegal to marry your sister.

There was a boy in the gym who was in his late teens. He was sitting at the dumbbells tables, but he wasn't lifting. He instead, sat up and was ripping something up.

The manager then walked over to him and asked, "You're hogging the dumbbells, dude! What are you even doing?" The boy hesitated, then said, "Getting ripped, wanna join me?" as he held up stacks of blank paper. The man silently sat on the table with him and grabbed some papers. "Why not?" he finally said.

What happens when you are playing Undertale, but it's snowy in town? It SNOWED in town!

Part 2: He walks up to a stake and nails himself there. Then he finds the knife and says to someone to find a cake to celebrate his death, but everybody came. That was the sign that nobody loved him, and that's how you know if people love you.

A depressed guy walks into a utensil store and finds a knife, but he didn't stab himself... Part 2 coming out tomorrow.

What part in the body does an adult not need but actually needs to live?

A KIDNey!

It was 2017, and lots of people were hating RiceGum because he released "Frick Da Police," a diss track insulting Idubbbz's Content Cop video on RiceGum.

A few hours after the diss track was released, someone went to Rice's house and spray painted "Asian Jake Paul" on the wall of the front of his house.

Rice went to "meet" Idubbbz, then he saw the graffiti.

"WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEREEEEEEEEEEEEEE?"

Hours later, police found 4 suspects.

"Explain."

Sus 1: I don't vandalize.

Sus 2: I was staying indoors because it was rainy.

Sus 3: I fucking hate RiceGum, but I would not ruin his cheap ass house lol.

Sus 4: I eat bricks.

Police: I know who.

RiceGum: Who?

Police: ITS-

807907070707007607865909685780970695067586708650968095768076895708769875660980765970659062870907965607867856067586908

Notice anything in the number crowd?

Comment the answer below and I will see who is correct.

Jeffery Dahmer has two things: an RV and a pit.

What is different about the two is that one can't move and one has gas.

But what is similar is tha-

Wait, what is Jeffery doing? He has a knife, he is pulling men's pants down, he is...OH SHIT WHAT THE F-!

Sorry 'bout that......

Now, as I was saying,

What is similar about the two is that one has and is a cockpit.

Wait, a cockpit- JEFFERY WHAT THE F-!