Breath jokes
What do you call a shoe made by George Floyd?
The Breath Takers.
Depressed person: *chokes on food*
*involuntary coughs until they can breathe*
"AWWW! I failed the race!"
The sky never changes color, but when it does, we know how your breath is increasing.
Why can't George Floyd breathe? He had a knee on his neck, stupid.
My mom said the happier a person is when sick, the sooner they get better.
So I went to the hospital, hooked up everyone's breathing masks to laughing gas.
A 9-year-old girl lies on a hospital bed struggling to breathe as she waits for the doctor to come.
The doctor finally comes, and the little girl can breathe much easier after he pulls his cock out of her mouth.
What goes oOoOo on your breath that scared away the animals from the farm?
A man shoots up a school and then fakes his own death. He then later returns to shoot up the same school. He repeats the process a few times until the police catch him. When they ask why he did it, he replied, "I wondered when you would check if I was still breathing."
What did the elephant say to the naked man?
"How do you breathe through something so small?"
I live inside my own world of make-believe. Kids screaming in their cradles, profanities. I see the world through eyes covered in ink and bleach. Cross out the ones who heard my cries and watched me weep. I love everything. Fire's spreading all around my room. My world's so bright. It's hard to breathe, but that's alright. Hush, shh.
Tape my eyes open to force reality (oh no, no). Why can't you just let me eat my weight in glee? I live inside my own world of make-believe. Kids screaming in their cradles, profanities. Some days I feel skinnier than all the other days, And some days I can't tell if my body belongs to me. I love everything. Fire's spreading all around my room. My world's so bright. It's hard to breathe, but that's alright. Hush, shh.
I wanna taste your content. Hold your breath and feel the tension. Devils hide behind redemption. Honesty is a one-way gate to hell. I wanna taste consumption. Breathe faster to waste oxygen. Hear the children sing aloud. It's music 'til the wick burns out. Hush.
Just wanna be carefree lately, yeah. Just kicking up daisies. Got one too many quarters in my pockets. Count 'em like the four-leaf clovers in my locket. Untied laces, yeah. Just tripping on daydreams. Got dirty little lullabies playing on repeat. Might as well just rot around the nursery and count sheep.
I've recently been treated with Asthma and have been prescribed penicillin. One day I was taking it and a man screaming "SUIII" came into the room and stole it! He thought the penicillin would give him penalties. I couldn't breathe, shame on you Penaldo for ruining my life!
What does a shark smoke? Sea-weed.
How do whales breathe underwater? They take a deep meth.
What did the Los Angeles Police do when George Floyd said that he could not breathe? They gave George Floyd two squirts of Zicam cold remedy inside his nose.
Yo mama so old, I bet she was born when dinosaurs were made, and also she killed them with they breath! 😭😭
Ur mum smells like shit, yeah, so she sucks a man off and washing machine. Yo, don’t at me, yeah, you chicken breath.
Q: What did the elephant say to the naked man?
A: How do you breathe through that little thing?
I like George Floyd's new song. It is really breathtaking.
Baby > commits start breathing.
Mom > commits abort.
Baby > commits ohshit.exe
What do George Floyd and Jordan Neely have in common?
Both can't breathe.
So this blind man was walking down the street with his stick, right? And he walked past this fish market, he took a deep breath and said, "WWOAAH GOODMORNING LADIES!"