Breakfast jokes
I went home one day and see a few married guys in line in my sister's room. I ask what's going on, my sister is running a contest. The contest is the married guys lick her pussy and guess what she had for breakfast. The winner gets a free blowjob. As a brother, I couldn't be more prouder that she thought that she made up that contest.
Bf: Hey, what ya doing?
Gf: Just lying in bed.
Bf: Just lying in bed?
Gf: And eating cereal.
Bf: Ha, nice, what would you do if I was in bed next to you...?
Gf: Eat my cereal.
Bf: I mean if the cereal wasn't there.
Gf: I'd get out of bed and get more cereal.
Why do orphans eat cereal with water?
Because their daddy still hasn't come home with the milk.
A person laughs every day.
"Man," they say, "I'm glad I'm not an egg, otherwise I'd just CRACK MYseLf uP!"
You smell like tap water and cornflakes.
Memes
I have a lot of eggcellent egg puns, get the yolk... Oh come on, don't be hard-boiled!
One morning, Peppy and George came downstairs for breakfast, but they got a plate of juicy bacon. Their dad had recently gone missing, so they ate it quite sadly.
The next morning, they went to school and asked their teacher, "What is bacon made out of?" The teacher replied, "Pigs, why?" Peppa and George looked horrified.
Cereal.
Aren't my egg yolks amazing? Don't they make you crack up? If not, I better scramble!
My eggcellent egg yolks crack everyone up.
If you don't like them, you're just hard boiled.
Why are eggs bad at puns?
They always mix up their yolks!
Me: Do you take milk before cereal, or cereal before milk?
The adult person I asked: Cereal?
Me: I take the bowl first! What do you do? Do you just pour everything on the table and then eat it?
The person: Yes.
Me: WHAT?!!!??!!
What did the pencil say to the piece of paper? You FLAT.
What did the spoon say to the pancake batter? You THICK.
Why don't lesbians have sex in the morning?
Have you ever tried pulling apart a grilled cheese?
Did you try the digital egg padlock? Because it is very easy to crack the code.
When I bring someone breakfast in bed, I want to hear a thank you. And no, “What are you doing in my house?”
What do you call a gay guy eating Cheerios?
Fruit Loops.
What age is served for breakfast?
Yo momma's titty milk taste like Captain Crunch.
You know why eggs can't tell jokes?
They crack each other up!
