Bowl jokes
Your mum is so fat and so dumb that she took a spoon to the Super Bowl.
What do you call a bowling ball that falls from the sky and knocks down all the bowling pins?
An airstrike.
Yo mama so stupid, she brought a spoon to the Super Bowl.
Me: Do you take milk before cereal, or cereal before milk?
The adult person I asked: Cereal?
Me: I take the bowl first! What do you do? Do you just pour everything on the table and then eat it?
The person: Yes.
Me: WHAT?!!!??!!
Jomama so dumb, she brung a spoon to the Super Bowl.
If you got a bowling ball and you stuck it on top of a sack of potatoes, what would you get?
A "retiree."
The Eagles when they actually thought they were gonna win the Super Bowl. 😹
What do you call a very long bowl?
Manute Bowl.
When your friends [are] talking about sports:
Jake says, "It was 17.56M people watching [the] basketball championship."🦁
Sam says, "It was 113M people watching the Super Bowl." 😯🐱
Avion says, "It was up from 1.12 billion people watching [the] World Cup." 😶🙀
I got fired from the bowling ball factory for throwing out the ones that had holes in them.
Your mom is so stupid that she brought a spoon to the Super Bowl.
Your mama is so fat, when her husband said, "Let's go to the Super Bowl," she bought a spoon.
When I'm peeing in a toilet I don't pee directly into the water. I pee on the curved part of the bowl beside the water because I figure it splashes less, but when you're peeing that close to the edge, the sporadic tiny offshoots of pee become a greater threat.
I'm not sure if the accumulation of these offshoots is greater than the potential splashback from peeing mid-bowl. It's possible that I'm thinking about this too much, but it's also possible that I'm not thinking about this enough.
A guy dies and finds himself in Hell. Despondent, he sits on the ground and weeps uncontrollably.
Demon: "Why so sad, my friend?"
Guy: "What do you think? I'm in hell!"
Demon: "Hell's not so bad. We actually have a lot of fun down here. You a drinkin' man?"
Guy: "Sure, I love to drink."
Demon: "Well, you're gonna love Mondays then. On Mondays, that's all we do, is drink. Whiskey, tequila, vodka, beer... We drink till we throw up and then drink some more."
Guy: "Gee, that sounds great!"
Demon: "You a smoker?"
Guy: "You better believe it."
Demon: "Alright! You're gonna love Tuesdays. We get the finest cigars from around the world and smoke our fucking lungs out. If you get cancer, it's ok, you're already dead!"
Guy: "Golly."
Demon: "I bet you like to gamble."
Guy: "Yes, as a matter of fact, I do."
Demon: "Good, because Wednesday is gambling day. Craps, blackjack, horse races, you name it."
Guy: "Wow."
Demon: "You like to do drugs?"
Guy: "Well, I love to do drugs. You don't mean..."
Demon: "That's right! Thursday is drug day. Help yourself to a great big bowl of crack. Smoke a joint the size of a submarine. You can do all the drugs you want, and if you overdose, it's ok... You're already dead!"
Guy: "Neat! I never realized hell was such a swingin' place!"
Demon: "You gay?"
Guy: "Uh, no."
Demon: "Ohhh... You're gonna hate Fridays...."
Your mama so fat when she stepped on a scale it said, "Ma'am, take the bowling ball off of the scale!"
What's the difference between an orphan and a bowl of apples?
The apples got picked!
I got a bowl of rice that you're formed like, an ice cube.
Who are the best at bowling?
Terrorists, they always throw strikes.
Your mom is so fat that she brought a spoon to the Super Bowl.
Do orphans eat cereal with water?
Their dad did not come back with the milk.