feeling stressed? have a nice cup of tea and spill it in the lab of the person bothering you.
-a beautiful woman is on the ledge of a bridge about to commit suicide-
a homeless man walks by her and says "what are you doing?"
she says "im going to jump"
the homeless man says "if youre going to kill yourself, do you wanna have sex with me first?"
the woman replies "no way creep! never that!"
the homeless man doesn't seem bothered and says
"thats fine, I'll just wait til you're at the bottom"
Bully: I wouldn't bother wasting my time on a shit person like you Me: At least I have a brain unlike you Bully: Well at least I have a mom unlike you Me: Well your mom is so fat that she got stuck in her car and started bleeding Nutella? Bully: How would you know that? Me: Because she told me herself Bully: How exactly? Me: She's on the phone right now Phone: *High pitched animal noises* Me: Told you so
can’t be bothered with jokes, me and syd drake fuck 24/7
My bother apparently has this thing called "asthma", anyways I took his vape away today and he was lying on the floor gasping for air lol. He must really be addicted to it.
therapist: and what is it about this generation that bothers you?
satan: i give them the intro tour and they just say shit like “ooo spooky lol”
therapist: that's not so bad
satan: when i showed one girl the pit of everlasting flame, she sighed and said “big mood”
The cold winter night there was a cabin in the woods. The cabin housed 3 men. The men where gay but they did not know. Fili: Fili. Kili: And Kili. Fili and Kili: At your service. Kili: You must be Mr. Baggins. Bilbo: No! You can’t come in, you’ve come to the wrong house. Kili: What?! Has it been canceled? Fili: No one told us. Bilbo: Can...! No, nothing’s been canceled. Kili: That’s a relief. Fili: Careful with these, I just had them sharpened. Kili: It’s nice, this place. Did you do it yourself? Bilbo: Uh...no, it’s been in the family for years. That’s my mother’s glory box, can you please not do that? Dwalin: Fili, Kili, come on, give us a hand. Kili: Mr. Dwalin. Balin: Let’s shove this in the hole, or otherwise we’ll never get everyone in. Bilbo: Ev...everyone?! How many more are there? Oh, no! No, no. There’s nobody home! Go away, and bother somebody else! There’s far too many dwarves in my dining room as it is. If...if this is some blockhead’s idea of a joke, I can only say, it is in very poor taste! One of the Dwarves: Get off, you big lump!
Then the men only had one seat they had in the cabin. it was a bar seat. they where able to flip it upside down and fit all of them on it
I spent 10 hours applying makeup so I could look pretty when I was going to have sex with my partner.
I needn't have bothered.
The next day, it was smeared all over my face.
Person: Sorry to bother you, but what's the quickest way to get to the hospital?
Stranger: Oh, just go Stand in the middle of the road.
Me: "What are you doing??" Bully: "Where's my nan's urn?!?" Me: "I don't know." Bully: "Tell me!! *says worthless shit*" Me: "Next time you're looking for the urn, don't bother, I smoked her ashes. They were so fucking good. I then used a quarter of them as an exfoliator, cleared my acne and eczema btw!! Then built sandcastles with them, then blew them in your family's face after!"
Don't bully kids.
If you see a woman get raped, don't bother helping, after all they are iNdePendEnt and need no man.
Cheer on the rapist if you want
A young teen was walking home from school and having a nice day.
She gets home eats, showers, and heads to her room. The young teen hears her mother say something, not sure what she said the girl replies with "ok".
The young teen was gonna head to bed wondering when her mom was gonna come in and say goodnight she lays in bed, but then she hears her mom's voice say "Hunny I'm home", she doesn't bother to say ok.
Later when she decides to sleep she gets a message from her mom saying to unlock the door that she lost her keys. :)
-Dark_Humor
I have a confession. I used to be a Christian don’t bother me none babe Awesome! I much prefer being a Christine! “hol up”
If a woman gets raped, just walk away, don't bother. Cheer on the rapist if you want.
They believe they are equal to men right? So they are able to fight back right? Then prove it! My EQUALITEHHHHHHHH
Where did Sally go during the bombings? Everywhere!!
Why didn’t the parents bother looking for her? Because she was in the front and back yard in small chunks😂
I am always high, welcome to bipolar disorder. LMAO (don't bother to like or comment I just had to say this)
let it go, LET IT GO! Blablablabla whatever the rest of the song says dun dun blablablabla my mom never bothered me anyway
I'm bored 😴 so thats why I sang in my wonderful voice for a few seconds and wasted ur time
I cleaned my room today. While sweeping under the bed, I heard my mop collide with something. To my surprise, I found Pristiano Penaldo hiding under my bed! My dad said “don’t bother sweeping him son, hes been dusted for years” I was shocked but not surprised.
