Disturbance jokes

Q: What did Darth Vader say to his smashed wristwatch?

A: I find your lack of face disturbing.

My friend's dad died during 9/11. He was such a good pilot, but my friend kept disturbing him, so when his dad died, he said, "It was you who killed me" (to the child).

So the child said, "Yoo-hoo? What type of name is Yoo-hoo, but Yoo-hoo, Yoo-hoo come here, I need to kill you NOW."

My wife and I watched The Perfect Murder together. Excellent movie, but what disturbed me though was my wife constantly taking notes.

When I'm chilling and a little kid ruins my moment.

Slavery and discipline, it's kind of the same thing. You get whipped for doing the wrong thing.

I don't like consistency. Last night, I spent three hours looking at a room and thinking, "I need a flower pot here, and the couch should be on the right." Eventually, the police arrived and led me away from my neighbor's window.

Guys, I guess with all these storms there was a power cut in his house.

Have you ever felt an earthquake? It’s not nature; it’s Brandan Bressler.

My girlfriend is 19 and I'm 29. We go out to eat in a restaurant, but the whole time I have to deal with being accused of being a pedo, being called disgusting and disturbed.

It completely ruined our 10 year anniversary.