A man walks into a doctor's office, naked and wrapped in Glad Wrap.
The doctor replies with: "I can clearly see your nuts."
Did you just come from a bakery? Because you’ve got the hottest pair of buns I’ve seen all week.
You know stairs, right? The dark... My there is something. I know that if you fall down the stairs, your balls will be crushed!
Did you know you don't actually wash your hands?
They wash each other while you stand there looking at them like a creep.
Kid me: I lost my stick.
Teacher: No, you didn’t.
Kid me: How do you know that?
Teacher: It’s hanging out of your pants.
Why do cheetahs have spots outside of their bodies?
Because they don't have them on the inside.
Your forehead is so big that when you put glasses on top of your head, it falls off.
Why are quadriplegics so unsympathetic? Because they only have feeling in %10 of their body.
Ryan: Mother, if you had 10 cookies, and I took 4 away from you, how much do you have?
Mother: I will still have ten cookies, because I will not give any to you.
Ryan: What if I forcefully take 4 cookies away from you?
Mother: I will have 10 cookies and a dead body.
Ryan and his mother had cookies that day. Ryan took all 10 cookies. He was never seen again. R.I.P Ryan.
Once there was this kid that wanted to shower with his dad, so his dad said yes. Then he asked, "What is that?" and his dad said it's a chow chow train.
The next day, he wanted to shower with his mom, so she said yes. He asked again, "What is that?" and she said it was a tunnel with light.
The same day, he wanted to sleep with them, and they said yes.
In the middle of the night, he woke up and told his mom to turn on the light because the chow chow train is going in.
I gotta song for Hawaii baby you light up my world like no body els
I have no legs
Whats the difference between my basement and my garage one has a pile of babies bodies the other has their heads
Why was Timmy so sad? Because his dad stapled a frog to his forehead.
A little boy and a little girl were taking a bath.
The little girl looked down and said, "What's that?"
"That's my little red sports car," said the little boy.
The little boy looked down and said, "What's that?"
"That's my little red sports car garage," said the little girl.
A few seconds later, the little girl said, "How about you put your little red sports car in my little red sports car garage?"
"Sure," said the little boy.
The little boy's mother was downstairs and heard this blood curdling scream. She ran upstairs. Once she got there, she saw blood all over the bathtub. "What happened?!" she said.
"Well, Johnny tried to put his little red sports car in my little red sports car garage...but it didn't fit...so I cut the back wheels off..."
I think my penis has facial recognition
If you unironically think Someone who killed themselves should have their body in jail you are honestly such a Fucking embaresment to humanity
Shorts go up,Pants go down Body to Body, Skin to Skin When its sniff, Stick it in It goes in dry and comes out wet And the longer its in the stronger it gets it comes out dripping and starts to sag
Its not what you think it is its a LIPTON TEA BAG
Get your mind together
Well, we've removed all of the excess fat from your body and all that's left I'm afraid is the wig, Mrs. Trump.
Why Cant You Nose Be Twelve Inches Because Then it Would Be A Foot
