They are hairy.
You're so skinny, you use chapstick as deodorant.
Don't tell me I haven't got balls. I just happen to wear mine on my chest, and I can guarantee they're a lot bigger than yours!
Sydney has a fat pair of spammy flaps that smell of fish 🎣.
I got a call from McDonald's; they want their sign back.
What's a little white dot on a priest's dick? A baby tooth.
That awkward moment when a fat kid says, “That’s how I roll.”
You're so fat,
when you stepped on the scale,
Buzz Lightyear came out and said,
"To infinity and beyond!"
What do my mom and a basketball have in common?
My mom's tits and ass are bouncy, just like a basketball.
There's something on your chin, no, the third one down.
Q: What's red during puberty?
A: The blood on my hands.
Did you hear about the guy that was cutting off people's feet and taking them?
It took my sole.
Someone asked me what the worst mistake you could make while being at work was, and I replied, "Being a doctor and mixing up the oral and rectal thermometers."
One day, I put a lady taffy on my ass.
What did one skeleton say to the other?
Skeleton 1: "I need a hand!"
Skeleton 2: (Throws up hand)
Skeleton 1: "That wasn't very humerus."
Skeleton 2: "Why do you have to be so heartless?"
Skeleton 1: "At least I had the guts to tell you!"
Why don't ants get sick?
Because they have anty-bodies.
What kind of ankle are you? A broken ankle.
What does the man cheeseburger say to the girl cheeseburger?
“You got nice buns!”
A skeleton walks into the hospital and said: "Doctor, Doctor, I broke my leg!" The doctor said: "I see..."
If someone licks your elbow, you won't feel it.
If you put your ear up to someone's leg, you can hear them say, "WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?!"
