Bigness

Bigness jokes

Ass

  • You walk into an area that has big asses on the wall, and they feel lifelike, so you put your dick into them, and you go on the opposite side of the wall, and women are naked through the wall.

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  • Sex

  • Yes, sir.

    Four big guys and they grab on my thighs. Blow up my guts like the 4th of July. If they keep fuckin' my butt then I might just cry. Poop and semen sprayin' on my eyes.

    He lick my dick and the cum start sprayin'. Charging up my dick I'ma go super saiyan. When he cum the fuckin' booty I don't do much playing. Then I whispered in his ear, like hey are you stayin'? He said yeah I'm not leavin'.

    I guess he George Floyd, cause always leavin'. Not breathin' he chew on my dick like a baby. That's teathin' I'm fuckin' a nigga I think it's named Steven. Hawkin' f*ck him 'til he ain't walkin', dick stone-cold call him BBC. Austin It's a booty massacre when I visit him in Boston. Bought him new titties I don't care what they costin'.

    Bitch, hop on the dick do a split. Shout out Lil Baby. My dick is as real as it gets, I'm not fuckin' on him if he don't have tits. I'm catchin' his balls like my name Kyle Bitz.

    There's four Big guys, they're grabin' on my thighs. They blow my guts like the 4th of July. If he keep fuckin' my butt then I might cry. There's poop and semen sprayin' on my eyes.

    Yes sir, that is a fact tho, take out my dick slip it in his asshole. Swinging my dick through the air like a lasso. Painted his face like Apollo Pocasso (ugh). But I'm not a very good artist, f*ck 'em all good 'til that. Nigga farted planted my seeds in his ass like a garden. The way I play with balls, you should call me James Harden.

    Yeah, DigBar is elite, there's four big guys and I'm takin' their meat. I eat the boy's butt, Then I chase him with skeet. And I charge for booty, I promise DigBar Isn't cheap. And I count dudes when I sleep, not sheep, get up in my sheets. And I'm beatin' on my meat.

    Bitch. We got four big guys and they grab on my thighs. And they gon' bust on my eyes.

    Table

  • As I’m lying down on the table for a radiation treatment, a small angel lands on one shoulder, a tiny devil on the other shoulder. And then the mind game begins:

    Angel: This won’t last long. You are perfectly lined up. The treatment only lasts a few mins. Remember, stay absolutely still.

    Devil: Did she just twitch?

    Angel: No. She didn’t twitch.

    Devil: I think I saw her finger twitch.

    Angel: Well, even if it did, it’s her thigh the techs are aiming at.

    Devil: She wants to scratch her face.

    Angel: Stop it! She can handle staying still a few minutes.

    Devil: But her cheek has an itchy spot.

    Angel: She can just let it itch. She doesn’t need to scratch every itch. She will just have to think about something else.

    Devil: Wow...that cheek is really itchy...

    Angel: Think about: Flowers. Acrylic painting. Did the trash get picked up this morning? Her grandson Oliver’s smile...

    Devil: How about a song?

    Angel: Good idea!

    Devil: How about... “Never going to give you up. Never going to let you down....”🎶

    Angel: OMG! You just Rick-rolled her! She’s in the middle of a treatment! You know that’s the only part she knows!

    Devil: That’s okay. She’ll just repeat the words she knows over and over and over and....

    Angel: Don’t be so mean!

    Devil: “Never going to give you up...🎶”

    Angel: Stop it!

    Devil: Her toe! Her big toe! Did you see that? She just twitched it!

    Angel: No, she didn’t.

    Devil: I bet it screwed up the test and they have to start over....

    Angel: She didn’t screw anything up!

    Devil: She totally screwed the test up and they were more than halfway done. If they start over at the beginning, she will get too much radiation, and they will end up slicing her whole leg off!

    Angel: That’s not how it works...

    Devil: Or they just stop all together and she only gets a partial treatment and her tumor won’t get enough radiation.

    Angel: They know what they are doing!

    Devil: ...And it won’t shrink the tumor and the whole thing fails. And the doctor will have to amputate her leg.

    Angel: No! No! No! That’s not how any of this...

    Devil: ...And when they amputate, it will be at the hip and not below the knee because the tumor is in her thigh.

    Angel: Stop this right now!!

    Devil: “Never going to give you up....🎶”

    Angel: Stop!

    Devil: “...never going let you down....🎶”

    Angel: I’m not going to let you...

    Devil: “Never going to give you up...🎶”

    Techs: Okay. That’s it, Tammi! We are finished! How are you doing?

    Tammi: ...Oh, I’m fine.....

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  • Mama

  • Yo mama so fat, when she plays Undertale, Omega Flowey's mouth isn't big enough to eat her!

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  • Family

  • Why are Mexican families so big?

    They don’t know how to put a condom on.

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  • Orphan

  • One day an orphan went to jail, and a big dude went behind him and said, "I want you." The orphan said, "Finally!"

    Dick

  • Did you know that big black dicks can be weapons and can kill people?

    Floyd Mayweather proved it when he gave it to Logan Paul in the ass.

    Fish

  • What did the fish say to the other fish? "You have a big butt!"

    The other fish said, "We don't have butts......"

    Sex

  • It’s nice hitting it from the back when my wife has wide hips.

    Her butt cheeks look like big huge ball sacks as my thighs smack up against them when I’m thrusting. I like to finish off by grinding my weiner up and down her back like a gay man frotting his schlong on his partner’s ding dong.

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  • Basement

  • Kid: *runs down the street* HELP ME!

    Officer: You OK, kid?

    Me: Don't worry! He's my nephew, there was a big spider.

    Officer: Oh, OK, ma'am. *walks off*

    When officer leaves:

    Me: *gets whip* What did I say about leaving the basement?

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