Maishah the poo turned into a fart, which is the big fart monster's best friend. This is her: 🐷🐷🐷🐷🤢🤢🤢💩💩💩💩👊🏻👊🏻👊🏻👊🏻👊🏻🐽🐽🐽
Where do you find the best comedians?
In the funny farm!
What is the best Christmas present ever? A broken drum! You just can't beat it!
What do you call an angry reindeer? RUDE-olph!
What is Santa's favorite breakfast? Snowflakes!
What do you get if you eat Christmas decorations? Tinsel-itis!
Things said by racist aliens:
"Some of my best friends are Green."
"I just know that Orange guy stole my spaceship."
"You're very pretty for a Purple girl."
"We know you Tentacletians like to rape everyone with your tentacles!"
"Adax Hitao should have finished off you Bluish people."
"You 2-headed people are so stupid!"
"No Slimatians are allowed in this restaurant because of health codes."
"Get out of my store you grigger!"
"The Plu Plux Plum meeting is tonight! Let's burn some spaceships on the Greenies' lawns!"
What is the best power that man can do? They can move the mountain with their tongue.
The other day, my best friend flipped off the table in class. I thought it was flipping amazing!
Where do you go to get the best fish?
A restaurant on the Titanic.
What's the best thing about Switzerland?
I don't know, but the flag is a big plus.
"Grandma, tell me a story!" I said as we huddled near the campfire.
"Alright," she said, "Once, there was a tree named Timmy, he was my best tree friend. I used to read books under him and climb all his branches."
"Where is Timmy now?" I asked.
Grandma pointed to the campfire.
My uncle died in the 9/11 attacks. He was the best pilot I had ever met.
I caught my mom licking up and down and deep throating a banana. I said, "Why are you doing that?" She replied, "I’m doing it for practice for who could suck the best dick contest in the neighborhood."
What's the best part of a vegetable? The wheelchair.
How do you make a tissue dance? You put a boogie in it!
1273. Depression got the best of me. I'm gonna cry in my room now.
What's the best thing about taking a shower with a 12 year old Philippino girl?
If you slick her hair back, she looks 10.
When you’re having the best sex in your life and your grandma says, “I’m not dead!”
It's best not to say "Hail Satan" because he can't control the weather!
Cancer is the best thing ever! Hahah, fuck all you cancer patients!
Why is the iPhone X best for orphans?
There is no home button.
What's the best thing about a blowjob?
- The silence.
