Being jokes

I was at school one day, and my teacher gave me homework. Once I got home, I did not do my homework, but I watched TV. After the movie, I finally went to go do my homework. I was almost done with my homework when I got to the last question. I didn't know the answer, so I asked the closest living being to me, which was my dog, and I asked him: what's two minus two? He said nothing.

For all those Simpsons fans out there, this one I'm sure you know:

Abe: "It's rotten being old. No one listens to you."

Lisa: "It's awful being a kid. No one listens to you."

Homer: "I'm a white male, aged 18-49. Everyone listens to me--no matter how dumb my suggestions are."

Why are there a lot of whites in hockey?

It’s the only other job that involves beating something black other than being a cop.

  • 6

    • How many cops does it take to change a light bulb?

    None, they all beat the room for being black.

    I have a confession. I used to be a Christian.

    Don’t bother me none, babe!

    Awesome! I much prefer being a Christine!

    “Hol up”

    What's the only good thing about being an orphan?

    All snacks are family sized!

  • 5

    • We shouldn't joke about rape, because rape is no laughing matter...

    Unless you're being raped by a clown.

  • 4

    • Stop being disrespectful to all those people and their parents. Oh, I forgot, they don't have any parents.

    When I was a little boy, I had this dream. I was eating a giant marshmallow.

    When I woke, I was being sexually abused.