Why do people have sex? Because they're dumb.
Your mom is so stupid, she thought eating ass was cannibalism.
If you're bored, hump Danny and fuck him. What is he, goons do fuck rock?
Why did the cow cross the road?
To prove he wasn't a chicken.
What do you call a Censor with Autism?
A Censorspaz.
Why did Bob fall? Because gravity was mad at him.
One day my pet barked at me and so I got scared and was my dad actually. It was weird, you should’ve saw him and so the day goes on because he likes to run around the house that he likes to do it out 😂😂😂😂😱
Why did the chicken cross the road?
For absolutely no reason.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Because some kid was flossing!
What did the man say after he slipped and fell on the ice? Nothing, he just gave everyone the cold shoulder.
What do you call a snobbish criminal going down the stairs?
A condescending con descending.
What's the difference between a bear with a gun and an American man with a gun?
The bear has common sense not to fire it.
What is the difference between an emo and a normal person?
An emo slits.
When you see an "Autistic child zone" sign and say, "Oh! That wasn't a dog."
Why did the toad cross the road?
To show his girlfriend he had guts.
"I only eat food on the right of my plate."
"Are you good at eating?"
"I'm alright at eating."
Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was running from you, hehe.
I asked my girlfriend if she was a smoke alarm. She said, "Is it because I warned him when hotness came?" I said, "No, you don’t shut up!"
Kids, next time you have school dinners, make sure you have something you actually like so you don't have to shove all your food over to one side of the plate to make it look like you've eaten more than you actually have.
I'm like a rubber because people hit me as I can't feel.
