Astronomy jokes
Yo mama so fat, when she went swimming, they found water on Mars!
Uranus spins on its side.
What do you call a fat chink?
Saturn.
There were 3 blonde scientists...wait that’s not the joke. The first one said “we are going to pilot the first unmanned spacecraft to land on the sun.”
The second one said “but we can’t do that - if we get within 5 feet of the sun we’ll freeze to death!”
The third blonde says “so we go at night.”
Why do planets circle the sun?
'Cause they like the game of ring-around-the-rosy.
Why do you have to watch your back at NASA? They want to probe Uranus.
Why did the sun not go to college? Because it already has a million degrees!
Yo mama so fat, she wears Orion's belt!
Your hairline is so close to Earth, it's 100 million lightyears away!
Your butt is bigger than Uranus!
Hey, I never knew we had a planet in our body!
🌍: You're so hot!
🌎: How are you single?
☀️: I burn anyone who gets too close!
Friend, your mum's fat.
Me: Well, your mum's so fat, she played pool with the planets.
Fun fact: Most of the black holes in the universe are found in Africa!
Do you think Mars prefers Sour Orbiters sweet?
Orbiter: "Or bitter?"
If the sun had a kid, it would be like father, like sun. 🤓 😎
Little Jimmy has 5 red apples. His dad's car will arrive in 20 minutes. Calculate the mass of the Sun.
Every moon has a silver lining.
Why did the sun go to school? To get brighter!
"Dad, how do stars die?" -- "Usually an overdose."