What do you call a person with no arms and legs? You can call himm whatever you want he's not coming.
Kid: Dad whats a dark joke? Dad: well you see that guy over there? tell him to wave. Kid: but dad im blind. Dad: exactly, also the dude had no arm
a: why did sally fall of the swing? b: why? a: cause she has no arms. knock knock b: whos there? a: not sally. joe was eating ice cream while walking on the street. he dropped his ice cream. why? b: i dont know, why? a: cause sally was driving the car.
Yo mama was so fat, Huggy Wuggy couldn't fit his arms around her :(
I went to self-checkout at a store and i scanned my products. But the scanner wouldn ́t scan the barcode on my arm.
Once i was walking along the beach and there was a girl with no arms or legs there, i walked by and she said excuse me, will you touch me ive never been touched before, i was like okay so i touched her, i kept on walking along and there was the same girl, she said sir will you kiss me, i went alright so i went up and kissed her, i thought that was weird but anyway i kept walking along and there she was again, she said sir will you fuck me? I went okay so i picked her up and threw her in the ocean and went YOUR FUCKED NOW
Why do emos cut their arms because they can't cut the rope
Jesus was being hug up on the cross, and me and all the other people at the bottom of the hill were watching. Jesus cries out ''Peter, peter come to me!'' So I climb up the hill on my hands and knees, and when i reach the top the Romans cut of my arms and chuck me back down the hill. ''Peter, peter come to me!'' cries Jesus once more. I stumble up the hill then the Romans cut my legs of and threw me back down. For the third time Jesus cries ''Peter peter come to me!''. So i wriggle up the hill and I guess the romans pitied me and let me through. ''Look peter, I can see my house from here!''
Someone asked me, "What are them scars on your arm?" I thought I was playing a violin.
I wanted to play fruit ninja but remembered I don’t have a phone. Guess I gotta draw fruit on my arm
What has two legs, two arms, one dead and covered in red? My ex wife.
Son: Mom whats dark humor?
Mom: Do you see that man without arms over there? tell him to clap
Son: mom i’m blind
Mom: Exactly
Son: Mom whats dark humor? Mom: Do you see that man without arms over there? tell him to clap Son: mom i'm blind Mom: Exactly
What has 15 arms 9 legs 8 heads and 12 eyeballs
A mosque after i missile strike it
What's the difference between a grape, an apple, and an arm? You don't slice a grape.
what did the woman do when the armed police officer raped her?
freeze
One afternoon, a man was walking to a bar after work. Across the street, an Irish nun stood there waving her arms at the man. "Look at this poor drunkard! The Lord does not love him! He will be sent to Hell!" the nun shouted.
The man walked over to the nun. "Hey! I had a hard day at work! I was going to get ONE beer! Have you ever even tried a drink before?" the man asked. The nun looked down and shook her head. "Well, if you tried it, you would probably like it! Would you want to try something?" the man asked. The nun replied, "Okay, only one thing."
"What would you like?" asked the man. He offered her beer and whiskey, but she declined. "How about a little gin?" the man concluded. "Okay, sure. But, can you ask them to put it in a mug so people don't see what I'm drinking?" asked the nun.
"Fine," the man walks into the bar and waves to the bartender. "Hey, can I have a bottle of beer and a bit of gin? Also, can that be in a mug?" asked the man. The bartender looked up, with fury in his eyes. "Don't tell me that damn nun is out there again!" the bartender said.
so there was this girl on the street that had no arms or legs that said hey sir i've never been fucked before will you do the honors and fuck me, so I threw her in the ocean and said well your fucked now.
Jack and jill went home because he was sick because of the virus in town game him a frown and his arms were pricked
TRUE STORY!
X-Ray Tech: I broke my arm and went to the hospital. The X-Ray Tech was the hottest blonde I've ever seen. I threw her ass down on the X-Ray table, ripped her clothes off, ripped off mine and I jumped on top of her! Then I put the X-ray machine on top of us, turned it on and I looked up on the X-ray monitor and I watched and saw my sperm swimming up inside her!
