Ares jokes
Your hairline jokes are so bad that they make me want to rip all my hair out.
What do black men in the NBA like about going to the locker room after they are done playing basketball?
Receiving golden showers from other black teammates.
If you’re bored, punch an orphan.
What are they gonna do, tell their parents?
Sorry.
Why are you sorry?
Sorry for putting deez nuts in your mouth.
Roses are red, I like burgers on a bun.
This news: family neuters furry son.
I will always remember my grandpa's last words after robbing a bank: "Oh, shit! The pigs are catching up!" But the cops did not kill him; he drove full speed off a cliff.
Your hairline is so far back dinosaurs are seeing it.
Girl: Boys are like sports, they get played.
Boy: Girls are like rocks, the flat ones get skipped.
A baby and his father are sitting in a street cafe. A woman bends over to pick up her keys just as a gust of wind blows up the woman's dress. "va va voom," the baby says. The dad chuckles and says, "Yes. I'd like to have sex with her too."
You're snorting cocaine with your buddies. Your eyes are closed, feeling the bliss of drugs, when suddenly something wet touches your nostril. Your buddy Mark stuck his PENIS in your face. You look up at Mark, and he says, "I'm sorry," and runs away, his pants still down.
How many feet are in feet?
What does a kid say to an orphan, "Where are your parents?"\n\n"I don’t have parents. Where are yours? Are you an orphan like me? I hope not!"
What song does an orphan hate?
"We Are Family."
Why does your mom hate you?
Because you are a loser.
Why are orphans bad at baseball?
They don't know where home is.
There are days I feel really bad for my Wife. She has to feed me in the same place I take a dump.
She really hates it when I spit my food back out.
Why are chickens so awesome? Because... Chicken noise.
Man: Oi, dude, why did you shoot the orphans!?
Other man: Because.
Man: Because why!?
Other man: Because who are they gonna tell? Their parents?
Why are sex toys something to stuff in your asshole and not a big racecar?
Why can’t you yell at a kid?
Because the cops are after you.