Ares jokes

Words can’t describe how beautiful you are.

But numbers can. (Lol)

Why are fish so smart? Because they live in schools.

Are you a nation leader or an email deleter?

Okay, roses are red, violets are blue, Barney looks better than you.

Why does everyone like couch jokes?

Because they are sofa-nny (so funny)!

"The only way I'd want to be reincarnated is if I can be reincarnated as a man," said the young woman.

"Why?" said her friend.

"Oh, I don't know, just men are so cool,"

"Is that the only reason?" said her friend.

"Maybe........" said the young woman. "Maybe."

What are all grandmas infected with? Defiantly not a parasite!

Friend: Hey, did you catch that game last night? I did, it was so good! After that I went to Kane’s, because Kane's is amazing! What did you do this weekend? I did-

Me: Dude, are you the Terms and Conditions? Because I don’t give a fuck about what you say.

Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin says, "Phew, it's hot in here." The other muffin says, "OMG, a talking muffin!"

Q: Why is it fun to hit an orphan?

A: Who are they going to tell, their parents?

Orphans and homeless people are the same thing.

Wow, all these jokes are humerus!

What are you doing, son? It has been an hour, and you are still in front of the mirror closing your eyes.

Mum, actually I want to see how I look while sleeping...

Is it bad to hit an orphan?

What are they gonna do, tell their parents?

Well... I mean, they could go to church and try to gather that someone hit them.

Hey John, how are you going?

Helium, yeah good, what about you?

(Hey Liam)

What are the similarities between Stephen Hawking and a bull?

They both charge.

Walk up to an adopted kid and ask this, "How's your biological parents? Are they well?"

Eggs are so egg-cellent that they are sunny-side up.

If you are a robot, you cannot talk.

Roses are red, violets are blue, My heart is dead, I’m such a fool.