Ares jokes
How are laundry and Michael Jackson related?
They both got bleached!
ok this isn't a joke but it's funny.
Roses are red, nuts are brown, Skirts go up, pants go down. Body to body, skin to skin, when it's stiff, stick it in. It goes in dry, comes out wet, the longer it's in, the stronger it gets. It comes out dripping and starts to sag, It's not what you think, it's a lipton tea bag.
Get your mind out of the gutter.
Why do orphans not know Dom Toretto?
Dom Toretto cares about family.
A man has been dating a girl forever. He finally says, "I love you." The girl says, "Aww, thanks." The man looks at her, "Are you not gonna say it back?" The girl says, "No, I can’t."
Welcome to the Fast Food Divorce Center where yesterday's lies are today's fries.
When you are chilling in the World Trade Center, and then you suddenly get airplane WiFi.
Why are orphans very abusive to their kids?
Because they never had loving parents of their own.
I wrote a few jokes:
What does a 15-year-old boy do without two hands when his parents are not at home? Well, obviously do not jerk off.
Yesterday a girl from my job invited me to her home and there I had crazy sex. I could not think that her mother is so hot.
What will happen the morning after the destruction of humanity? Duncan MacLeod makes himself breakfast.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Terrier.
Terrier who?
Your Halloween decorations are terri-fying!
Roses are red, life has no meaning, voices in my head, are constantly screaming.
If you are disabled and a comedian, is it called stand-down or sit-up?
Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got genital warts, Soon you will, too!
Why can orphans give all you people posting all these stupid orphan jokes over and over again a good kick in the face?
Well, what are you gonna do, tell their parents?
P.S. Stop posting stupid orphan jokes over and over again.
People are like trees. They fall when you hit them multiple times with an axe.
I'm not racist, my best friends are black for Halloween. :)
I don't give two shits about how evil these are. They're funny.
Roses are red,
my life is a disaster,
the children are fast,
but the combine is F A S T E R!
Roses are red, Obama is well spoken, I'm sorry sir, but the ice cream machine is broken.
Girls are like roller coasters; the faster you go, the louder they scream.
What is the difference between Madeleine McCann and a submarine?
They are both full of seamen and are at the bottom of the ocean.