I have a friend of mine from school. I always see them with bangs, so I never knew what their forehead looked like until one day they came... Their forehead was bigger than Mount Everest, that you can make an entire Olympics mountain climbing audition on that forehead! :)
My mother said I'm sexy. I said no, I have cancer.
Yo mama so fat, she got arrested for carrying 10 pounds of CRACK.
You're so skinny, if you take a bath you look like you're in an ocean. 🛀🏊♂️
What's the best thing about taking a shower with a 12 year old Philippino girl?
If you slick her hair back, she looks 10.
Me: Imagine not having hair.
Kids: On chemo.
Bitch the fuck.
She saw me butt-naked, now she thinks I'm half Black.
A German priest went to America for a few months. Unfortunately for him, he did not speak the best English. He stayed with a beautiful, young single woman who worked at a nearby orphanage.
Every day, he visited her in the orphanage, and he always brought her small gifts, and of course to the young children.
The young woman thought the priest was flirting with him, and she knew he was not married. She left that thought in the back of her mind for a few weeks.
A few weeks later, she finally brought up her nerve to ask him. She asked him why he always visited her, and why all the gifts for her and the children.
Of course, due to his bad English, he struggled a bit with his sentence, but he said in his thick German accent, "Vell, I visit you and your, your littles, because the kind girls here are very beautiful and cute."
She was quite amused, and blushed a bit. The man was also a bit nervous, and appeared to want to leave her office.
The Priest then excused himself, and went to read the orphans a bedtime story.
He then muttered to himself, "Ach, she's catching on to me! Stupid! Zey are called little girls and boys, not child boys and girls."
Yo mama is so ugly, even the ugliest person in the world looked like a sword standing next to her.
You're so ugly Bob the Builder cat can fix you.
Normal people have a four-head, but bro... you got a fourteen-head.
I’m back and have a joke my friend said!
Person 1: My brother's Halloween costume is so ugly.
Person 2: What was it?
Person 1: He went as himself.
Roses are red, violets are blue, Mike Pence's hair is made of glue.
Yo, hairline is a distraction to my barber because he wanna fix it so bad (because of how bad it looks).
Why was Huggy Wuggy not able to hug Cody’s mom?
Because she was so fat he couldn’t fit his arms around her.
How come your sister is hotter than you? Funny, huh?
You are so ugly, when you went to a haunted house, you came back with a job application.
You are so ugly when you gave birth to your baby, you gave it carpet burn.
Your hairline is dancing umlando.
Your hairline is so long that sometimes even the president doesn't know where it ends.
