Appearance jokes
Roses are red, Violets are blue, I thought Shrek was ugly, until I saw you.
Yo mama so ugly, she went to a fat concert and they said no experts allowed! 😂
It's like your hairline and your forehead had a disagreement.
Hairline so big people had to time travel to find the end of it.
Yo mama so ugly, that when Santa came down the chimney he said, "Ho, ho- HOLY SHIT!"
Your dad left for the milk because of your McDonald's hairline!
Your hairline looks like Thanos snapped your hair out of existence.
Yo hairline so bent even Bob the Builder can’t fix it!
Your hairline is so long that when you finally found the length of it, you told someone and they said, "Don't give me your phone number."
I saw a fat dude wearing a shirt that said "guess." I said 215kg, he didn't find it as funny.
Yo mama so ugly, she got a lifetime ban from KFC for ordering too many burgers.
Husband: My wife and I went to the beach today.
Husband: She was wearing a blue wetsuit.
Husband: The second we entered the beach,
Pedestrians: "TSUNAMI! TSUNAMI!"
Your hairline goes so far back your mom can't even reach it.
Mom: That's why your dad left you.
Me: Why?
Mom: I mean look at you, depressed, suicidal, and unhappy, always anxious, and other mental health issues.
Me: How is that my fault? You are a rude mom!
Mom: Your dad had a heart attack two weeks before you were born, because you are ugly!
(This actually did happen in real life.)
You're so fat, that you're fat.
Your hairline so far back, it's a wide receiver for the Minnesota Vikings.
Yo mama so ugly, when she went to the ugly club, they said, "Sorry, professionals only!"
Your mom checked for your hairline, but she could not find it.
When was the last time you saw yourself in the mirror?
What's the difference between a low tide and your hairline?
Nothing, they're both receding.