Anti jokes
What makes piracy and anti-piracy so unique?
One isn't that of a thief, while the other is as serious as fuck.
What do you call a whiteboard that is dirty?
A dirty whiteboard.
Conservatives when they hear about “liberal arts:” 👊😡
Liberals when they find out about forest conservation: 😩👐
Progressives when they see a reaction video: 🤬
Reactionaries when a Progressive ad comes on (Flo is annoying): 😱
Anticoms realizing they are a part of a “community:” *seizure*
Anticaps when they have to Capitalize Their Words: 😤
Anti-monarchists when they pass a Burger King: 🫨
Antisocs when they are told to “socialize:” 🫠
Corporatists when they see a corpse: 🤤
Antifash when they spot a fashion show: 🤮
Classical liberals when the TV shows Family Feud: 😑🔫
Extremists when they are told to shoot “dead center” (they have bad aim): 😠🖕
What is a good time for dinner, and what do I do? You can do dinner. Was that it?
Imagine there's a funny joke here... imagined it? Great! Now check yourself into an insane asylum because you're schizophrenic.
Explain bear show yourself AND STOP RUINING MY ANTI TRUMP MEMES AND JOKES A IM COPING AND C THIS IS FOR JOKES AND MEMES also you are the Simpletin
Donald Trump is proudly anti-woke. He has been falling asleep in his court cases every morning!
Your move, Ron DeSantis.
What did the sunglasses say to the banana?
Nothing, sunglasses can’t talk.
Q: Why did the Mexican start taking anti-anxiety pills?
A: Because he was taking them for His-panic attacks.
What do cigarettes and hamsters have in common? They can both be dangerous when you stick them in your mouth and light them on fire.
What's white and annoying at breakfast? An avalanche.
Why did little Suzy fall off the swing? She got hit by an axe.
Why did little Billy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus.
How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.
Why did the man with no arms fall off his bike? Someone threw a washing machine at him.
You can tell a lot about a woman's mood just by her hands. For example, if she's holding a gun, she's probably angry.
Me at the Anti-Orphan Jokes convention. 💣🗡🔪🧨🔫
One night I was sitting on my bed in my room, minding my own business. It was pretty late, around 10 PM. The glow of my laptop screen was the only light in the room. I heard a noise coming from behind me. It sounded like the door was opening, but there was no one else in the house.
I turned around and found Mr. Incredible standing in my doorway, a stern look on his face. He walked over to me, slowly and dramatically. Then he leaned over and pointed his finger at my face, only about two inches away now. I was frozen with my back against the wall. Then, Mr. Incredible said something I would never forget: "Stop pirating video games."
Ever since that day, I have never gone on a pirating website and have paid legally for my video games. True story.
Why did the elephant cross the road? It didn't see the cars.
Where is the worst place to lock your keys in your car?
The anti-abortion clinic because you have to go back in and ask for a coat hanger.
What does a skeleton tile his roof with?
Tiles.
WTF did you think he’d tile it with?
Q. What's the difference between my phone battery and an anti-vax kid?
A. Nothing, they both die at ten.
Why are monkeys funny? Because they look weird.
Someone broke into my house and took my anti-depressants... I hope they're happy now.