ANS jokes
An unfortunate accident happened at the Nestlè factory. A man named Joe was seriously injured because a box of chocolates fell on him. Every time he said, "The chocolates are on me!" everyone cheered.
What do you call an orphan's family picture?
A selfie.
I saw Stephen Hawking using an ATM. It is nice to see he had found someone before he shut down.
What does an orphan and a lost kid have in common?
They have no way home.
How do you make an orphan clap until his hands bleed?
Tell him to clap until his parents come home.
Why can’t an orphan go on the field trip?
Answer: They don’t have a parent’s signature.
I went to the store the other day and scanned an emo's arm.
It gave me a discount!
How do you call a virgin girl in Alabama? An orphan.
I lost my luggage at an airport once. I sued the airline, but I lost the case...
What is a dog?
An animal.
Do not tell an orphan family meeting; they wouldn't get it.
What do you call an injured Panera Bread?
Panera Bled.
What is an orphan's first phone?
An iPhone 12. Wanna know why?
It has no home button :D
Little Johnny walked into an ice cream shop and asked: "Do you have chocolate filled ice cream?"
The man replies: "We are out of that, sorry, we are almost out of every single flavor, do you want me to get you a vanilla filled one?"
Johnny replies: "Sure."
After that, the man asks for Johnny's phone and goes to back of the store. 5 minutes later, the man comes with an ice cream and Johnny's phone.
Johnny asks: "How much for the ice cream?"
The man replies: "Nothing, it's on the house."
After Johnny ate his delicious ice cream, he searched for his watch history. And then Johnny realized the flavor of the ice cream.
So I told an orphan to slap themselves until they are wanted. I came back the next day to see them slapping themselves. Then I stopped them and told them to punch themselves.
The next day I saw a dead orphan.
What do you call an Italian with a rubber toe?
Roberto.
Why do mostly younger orphans get adopted?
Because who wants a traffic an adult?
Why can't you tell an Indian a secret? Because the red dot means they're recording!
Q: What do you get when you cross a donkey with an onion?
A: A piece of ass that brings tears to your eyes.
Me: Hey, are you an orphan?
Orphan: Yeah, what gave me away?
Me: Your parents.