ANS jokes

What do you call it when an orphan takes a picture?

A family portrait/A selfie.

Why does nobody know that an Octane is a Fennec in disguise?

They have the same hitbox.

A family put their kid and their dog in an orphanage but came back for only the dog.

What does an orphan call a family photo?

A selfie.

Q: What do you call an orphan taking a selfie?

A: A family picture.

What do you call an accomplished opera singer with recurring gonorrhea?

Standing ovation!

Why does Snoop Dogg use an umbrella?

Fo' drizzle.

What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?

One of them gets picked.

Q: How do you know when someone is an opposition leader to Putin?

A: When they are falling from their balcony.

What's the difference between an orgy and mass suicide?

When exactly my cult members drink the Kool-Aid.

Say this to your significant other (or your weird friends!)

Are you an unsafe staircase? 'Cause you look like you could use a railing.

Your sister is so ugly that she made an onion cry.

What's the difference between an orphan and an apple?

Apples get picked.

You call it a school shooting.

I call it an unfair shootout.

If you are going to bully anyone, then bully an orphan, because what are they going to do? Tell their parents?

Your sister is so stupid, she only thinks an onion will make people cry.

So I threw a coconut at her.

An apple and an emo are at the top of a tree, they both fall at the same time.

Who hit the ground first?

The apple won because the emo had forgotten to connect the internet.

An orphan boy at my school did really bad in a test and started crying.

I said, “Don’t worry, your parents won’t say anything.”

My ex was an orphan as a child.

I should have taken that as the first sign.

If her parents didn’t want her, why would I?

I came on for an orphan joke.

Then I realized they are a joke.