ANS jokes
I went to a tall girl and I asked her, "What do you do for a living?" She says, "An account." So I reply with, "An accounting the hairs on people's heads," and then I run away.
What's the difference between an emo kid and an apple?
One hits the ground when they fall from the tree.
What is the difference between an orphan and a non-orphan? You can slap the orphan, but not the non-orphan because they can actually tell their parents.
Your hairline is so far back that when I put on my glasses, I thought I saw an "M" for McDonald's on your hairline.
I made a website for an orphan.
It had no homepage.
What happened when the corn got scolded? He got an earful!
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
One gets picked, and the other doesn’t.
What do you call a dumpster with an antenna on it? Radio Morocco.
A cop pulls me over and asks if I have been drinking.
I'm an honest person and say yes, I did, so I take off my sunglasses and tell him that I now had 2 glasses less.
I got a bowl of rice that you're formed like, an ice cube.
I saw a kid crying, so I asked him where his parents were, and he started crying more.
Anyway, working at an orphanage is fun.
If you were to drop an emo and a leaf off a tree, who would hit the ground first?
The leaf, because the emo is always hanging.
What's the difference between an orphan and a pencil?
People actually have a use for one of them.
What's the difference between an orphan and a dog?
One of them is actually loved.
Your sister is so ugly that she made an onion cry.
What's the difference between an orphan and an apple?
Apples get picked.
You call it a school shooting.
I call it an unfair shootout.
What is the difference between an orphan and a phone?
A phone has a home button.
A man went hunting with his son and shot an animal.
The father asks the son to identify the animal he just shot, and the son answers: "Holy Cow!"
Father: "What do you mean, 'Holy Cow?'"
Son: "You shot a hole in the cow, of course!"
How do you make an emo mad at you?
Cut the rope.