ANS jokes
What do you call an autistic kid who just saw Transformers? Autistimus Prime.
I heard an unusual word the other day: "Opaque."
Unfortunately, what it means is unclear.
What do you call a skeleton's egg?
An egg-i-BONE!
I would never kill an animal. I'm more of a people person.
I was in the car, and I got out and saw a deer walking sexy, and I'm like, "What the..."
Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin says, "Phew, it's hot in here." The other muffin says, "OMG, a talking muffin!"
Never tell an orphan about a family matter; they wouldn't understand.
Fun fact: If you're an orphan, you probably don't know your parents.
What is an obese lady's blood type?
Nutella.
I'd make a joke about an obese person, but it won't work out.
New Teslas don't come with a new car smell; they come with an Elon Musk.
Q: How do you know an Asian person was in your house?
A: Your homework is done, breakfast is made, and your cat is gone.
What do you call an ice skating dwarf?
A midget spinner.
What do you call an Indian babysitter?
Nanny.
When you're mad, you might as well just punch an orphan because what can they do, tell their parents?
If you ever get bored, just punch an orphan in the face. What's he going to do? Tell his parents?
How do you make an orphan's hands bleed? Tell him to clap until his parents come home.
How did Steven Hawking die?
He blew a fuse doing an update.
I can measure the speed of an object, because I want to km/s.
What's the difference between you and an idiot? Not very much if you reword and post the same joke over and over.