Animal jokes
My owl turned 180 today.
He isn’t old, he just has a bad neck.
yo mama so fat she went swimming with the whales and sang "weeeeeee areeeee fammmilllyyyyy!!!!!!!"
Indian porn
Ooooh oooh oooh
Baaaaaa
Why did the roster cross the road twice?
To prove it was not a chicken.
What do you get when you cross a vacuum and a rooster?
A cock sucker.
Why do crabs never give to charity?
Because they're all shellfish.
Why do dogs like skeletons?
Because they're boneheads.
Why do bunnies like Bruno Mars? Because he got 24 carrots.
What do you call a cow in a moving van?
A: A mooving cow.
What did the cow say to the farmer? Moo away!
Reporter: "Excuse me, may I interview you?"
Man: "Yes!"
Reporter: "Name?"
Man: "Abdul Al-Rhazim."
Reporter: "Sex?"
Man: "Three to five times a week."
Reporter: "No no! I mean male or female?"
Man: "Yes, male, female... sometimes camel."
Reporter: "Holy cow!"
Man: "Yes, cow, sheep... animals in general."
Reporter: "But isn't that hostile?"
Man: "Yes, horse style, dog style, any style."
Reporter: "Oh dear!"
Man: "No, no deer. Deer run too fast. Hard to catch."
What's a cow's favorite thing?
A mooooovie.
What does a cow sound like when in a horror house?
Moo mooo moooooooo (screaming)!
What kind of fish knows math?
An anglerfish LOL
What is a cat's favorite Queen song... Don't stop meow.
What do you call a cow with stuff growing on it? Moscow.
If I was a cow and could dance, I'd bust some moooooves while I uddered some lyrics!
What do you call a short cow in tall grass? Udderly tickled :)
What did the daddy bullet say to his son when he missed the bull and hit something brown and gross?
"That is bull crap!"
What did the father bullet say to the baby bullet when he killed a bull by hitting it in the eye: "Bull's eye!"