And jokes
What goes in dry and comes out wet?
A dick.
A pedo is driving down a highway really slowly and gets stopped by the police. The officer asks why he was driving so slowly. The man answers, "I don't wake up the kids."
Shorkey will find you in bed tonight, and he will eat you like my joke or else...
What did the deaf, dumb, and blind kid get for Christmas?
Answer: cancer.
Imagine this... you're a lesbian, and you're doing it with your cannibal girlfriend. You say, "Eat me, baby!"
She pulls out a knife and fork.
Memes
What is the difference between a retard and a zombie anyway?
They’re always hungry and shuffle around aimlessly, moaning... Oh, and it takes a bullet in the forehead to put them both down.
Uh!!!
I ate the last of my Egyptian food, and now I falafel. I don't know why I made that joke. Probably just becuscus.
A man is watching TV and his wife comes down and says, "I just fell down the stairs, did you not hear me?"
Man, "Sorry, I thought it was the start of Eastenders!"
If sex with three people is called a "threesome" and sex with two people is called a "twosome," then I know why people call you handsome!
What did Schrödinger say to Shakespeare?
"To be and not to be."
A man walking on his roof, carrying an axe. He drops it on someone below him and says, "Sorry, it was an axe-cident!"
What's the difference between my ripped jeans and my arms?.
None.
What is the difference between Pikachu and an orphan?
Pikachu, I choose you!
"I've only been ripped off twice in my life. The first time was when I ordered three kebabs and they only delivered two. The second time was when we signed Cristiano Ronaldo."
-Al Nassr owner
You guys, this is my last time publishing something here. You guys have been sending rude comments, and I need to work on my mental health. Goodbye.
What's the difference between a joke and two dicks?
Women can't take a joke!
What's the difference between a white woman and a tornado siren?
The tornado siren doesn't get raped.
What’s the difference between rape and marriage?
With marriage, you get to keep the screaming woman.
What’s the difference between a mosquito and a blonde?
One stops sucking when you slap it.
What’s long, white, and full of cream? A cheese stick.