My sister told me only onions make you cry, so I always hit her back when she hit me, but I hit her with a shoe only to catch her cry.
I don't think my girlfriend likes it when I take my schizophrenia meds because she always goes away when I take them.
Which falls faster, a feather or an emo?
A feather, because the emos are always hanging in.
They always say you are what you eat! So I’d be nothing. That sounds about right.
You know, people always tell you to stand up for yourself. Why didn't anyone tell the World Trade Center that? 🤔
Bro, my friend is always using zodiacs as an excuse.
The other day he said he couldn't hang out with me because of cancer. I told him to fuck off. Then I realized why he was mad after that...
Why you should never borrow money from dwarves?
Because they are always short! 😁😁😁😁
Why are Mexicans good at Uno?
They always steal the green card.
Why does a deaf kid always like football? He gets signed.
What Pokémon is always disappointed? Wynaut.
orphan- am going to see my mom in the kitchen because they are always in there
orphan-realizes
My friend: Hey, why are you always smiling?
Me: 'Cause life is a joke and we’re all slacking it off.
Why are history teachers always women? Because they like to bring up the past.
Why do people love dating orphans?
Because they're always home alone.
I’m enyaw and I fancy my PE teacher. She is called Kelly Pearce and I go to Beckfoot Oakbank. I always watch her because I am a creep. I live at school under the stairs, but I also try [to] follow her home, and if I'm unsuccessful I look her up on a dodgy website and go on Google maps and look at her door.
I played Rock Paper Scissors with my friend Enyaw. I cba with jokes basically me and Enyaw always scissor.
Why do orphans love boomerangs?
Because they always return.
My late grandpa was always popular with women. One day, before he died, I asked him what his secret was. He said, "I inherited a watering hole."
Bewildered, I replied, "What does that have to do with anything?"
"I could easily get anyone wet because I was well endowed."
My Dad: Son, history always repeats itself.
Me: So you're gonna leave me again?
i always ask gay people what lgbtq means but i never get a straight answer
