What did the tree say to the Lumberjack? Leaf me alone
Being bullied by an artist? Want them to leave you alone? www.VincentVanGoghAway.com
So I heard Kenny's mom got moved to a nursing home.
He'll probably leave her alone now.
He doesn't eat vegetables.
Rey: Join me, Ben, you don't have to be alone anymore, join me.
Ben: But Rey, I've always been solo.
A brunette, a red-head, and a blonde are being chased by bandits. They are chased to the edge of a cliff and a genie appears. "I will help you escape," says the genie, "say what you wish to turn into, and you will become that thing." The brunette jumps off the cliff and says "Hawk." She turns into a hawk and flies away. The red-head says "Falcon." She turns into a falcon and flies away. Now the blonde is alone and the bandits are getting closer. She makes her decision and backs up, then runs toward the cliff. And...she trips and says "Crap."
The End
3 boy chiwawa were hot about this girl chiwawa. She tells them I will date whichever one of you can use liver and cheese in the same sentence. First dog say... I love cheese but liver is bland. She replay.. Really original. Next dog.. I love liver but chesse makes me constipated.. She replay.. Ewe gross. Third dog steps up.. Man Liver alone cheese mine. Winner dog 3.
What did one tree say to the tree that was a bully? "LEAF me alone."
Teacher: Now class, if you are dumb, please stand up. Class: *no one stands up* Teacher: Oh c'mon. I know someone over here is dumb. *waves her finger around the left side of the room* Little Johnny: *stands up* Teacher: Oh, Johnny, you think you're dumb? Little Johnny: No, I just feel bad you're standing alone.
a student was peeking in on a 10/10 chick and the guy was about to nut. the school shooter patted his back and told him to leave his corpses alone
Birthdays are weird. We celebrate being one year closer to dying. And we celebrate it with friends and family, which is totally not how we'll die.
We're all gonna die alone, not surrounded by friends and family.
What do you call a high school student? Alone and depressed.
Walking's a chore, let alone crawling
I had a horrible nightmare yesterday. I was in a room filled with all of my ex's, so I was completely alone.
Tyler: What's your favorite fruit? Frankie: Pineapple duh what's yours? Tyler: Pineapple Frankie: Wanna come over and watch some Netflix? I'm home alone Tyler: Absolutely!! What time should I be there? Frankie: Right Now Tyler: Sweet! Should I bring a condom? Frankie: Now enough talk let's fuck Tyler: I fought you never asked
how can you light up a candle in a ship which does not contain any instrument and you are alone with just a packet of candles? ans:just throw one candle in sea the boat will become lighter
A man and a boy are walking into a forest. It begins to get dark. The boy says "Mister, I'm scared." The man replies "How do you think I feel, I have to walk back alone."
Trump and two of his friends are stranded on an island with no internet connection and no way of getting home. As they frantically run around the island trying to get a signal so Trump can call his private helicopter to come and pick them up, Trump's wig falls off and lands on a magical lamp, from which suddenly appears a genie. As Trump replaces his wig, the genie announces that he will grant each man one wish for freeing him. The men stop to confer. The first one says he will wish for a plane to rescue him, the second wishes for a boat to rescue him and they tell Trump to wish for a helicopter to rescue him. Trump, being Trump, nods and says yes but he wasn't really listening. Then they approach the genie. The first one of Trump's friends wishes for a plane to rescue him, as agreed. The second one of Trump's friends wishes for a boat to rescue him, as agreed. Then Trump is left all alone, but instead of wishing for a helicopter to rescue him, as agreed, he says, "Aww, I'm lonely now. I wish both my friends were here with me!"
Why should you stay away from trees? - Because they wanna be leafed alone.
A doctor fell into a well and broke his collarbone. The doctor should attend the sick and leave the well alone! (from a 1940 quotations book)
So, a guy is walking with a young boy into the woods.
Boy: "Hey mister, it's getting dark out and I'm scared!"
Man: "How do you think I feel? I have to walk back alone!"
