Album

Album jokes

Beat

What is David Bowie known for when making music? He gets his beats from his kids.

Inch

What is 14 inches long and starts with D?

A Dookie From GREEN DAY

Band

Did you hear about the Mexican emo band? They're called "Hispanic at the Disco."

Stress

Why is Donald Trump under so much stress?

Because he signed up to be on an album where somebody says "no love for the rich" on it.

Rapper

Why did the rapper wear a watch to the studio?

Because it was all about the TIMING.

Rapper

Why did the rapper bring a pencil to the studio?

To drop some LEAD.

Rapper

Why was the rapper always so confident?

Because he had a lot of rhyme and reason!

Rapper

Why did the rapper take the bus to the studio?

Because their car ran out of RHYME.

Rapper

Why did the rapper become a chef?

Because he wanted to drop some HOT MIXTAPES.

Rapper

Why did the rapper bring a fishing rod to the studio?

To reel in some KILLER HOOKS.

Rapper

Why did the rapper bring a map to the studio?

Because they were lost in the BEATS.

Gun

During a show, I once asked the crowd if they were pro-guns, and the majority belted out in approval.

I asked a man in the front row why he was pro-guns, and he gave me the basic “personal protection liberty 2nd amendment” hooplah.

Very seriously, I told the crowd, “I’m pro-guns because I enjoy living in a world with only four Nirvana albums.”

My friend was the only one who laughed.

Cancer

Cancer is like your dad. It only comes back when Blueface baby drops a new album.