Airplane jokes
This joke's about flowers, the blue one's a violet.
Your mom's the Twin Towers and I am the pilot!
Three ladies were on a flight when suddenly the captain announced, "Please prepare for a crash landing."
The first lady put on all her jewelry. Surprised by this, the other ladies questioned her actions. The first lady replied, "Well, when they come to rescue us they will see that I am rich and will rescue me first." The second lady, not wanting to be left behind, began to take off her top and bra. "Why are you doing that?" the other ladies questioned. "Well, when they come to rescue us, they will see my great tits and will take me first." The third lady who was African, not wanting to be outdone, took off her pants and panties. "Why are you doing that?" the other ladies questioned. "Well, they always search for the black box first."
When you got on an airplane, the flight attendant asked which hairline you were flying with.
What do Drew Bledsoe and the Twin Towers have in common?
They both got taken out by two jets.
Why did the rapper become a pilot?
Because he wanted to take his flow to new heights!
I'd make a 9/11 joke, but it wouldn't fly anymore.
And if I tried it, it would probably crash and burn.
It just wouldn't help my comedy career take off.
What do you call a rapper who's also a PILOT?
Fly Guy
Sully: Praised after landing in the Hudson River.
Garuda Indonesia 421:
Sully's co-pilot:
What kind of pizza did the Twin Towers order?
Nothing, it was just plane.
What do you call plane crash victims?
Down to earth people.
Science can fly you to the moon, but religion flies you into skyscrapers.
Why can’t Helen Keller jump out of an airplane?
It scares the shit out of her dog.
My phone is just like the Twin Towers; they got put in airplane mode.
I thought I saw a cool sticker on my office window, then I realized it was getting bigger and bigger.
Pilot: So Kobe, it seems like you’re not going to make it to your destination in time, so I’m going to put it on autopilot so I can find a place to fill with gas.
Kobe: Take us to the side of that mountain at full speed. I don’t really want to go to the event anymore.
Two twins were talking in class. I threw a paper airplane at one of them.
Your momma is so fat that when she egged the Twin Towers, she threw a airplane on accident.
When the airplane saw the Twin Towers, it said, "We can't go over it, we can't go under it, we can't go around it, guess we will go through it."
I threw a paper airplane at the twin sisters. The teacher was upset. I guess they don't read the news.
Guy 1: Hey, can you stop making 9/11 jokes? My dad died during it.
Guy 2: Sorry, I will stop. What was your dad?
Guy 1: The pilot. He saw a KFC and wanted it, so, well, you know.